The Soul I Lost
by dragontattoo
Summary: This is a Bella and Edward love story, only with a slight twist.  I have taken the premise of Stephanie Meyer and made it my own. Raised the stakes as it were.  I hope you enjoy it as this is my first venture.
1. Chapter 1

I stood at the window and watched the sun rise over the roof tops. Its rays desperately tried to shine through the gloom of a dismal sky, but finally gave up, defeated.

Another dawn of another brand new day.

I smiled inwardly, today marked an event for me.

Today i will have been dead for one hundred and fifty years...exactly.

I grimaced...I, Isabella Swan...an immortal vampire.

I turned away from the window and sat down at my dressing table, studying the face in front of me.

A less likely looking vampire you would be hard pushed to find, i realised.

I had very long, thick blonde hair; the colour of corn on a hot summers day, large green eyes, a straight nose and a full mouth. My skin was pale unblemished alabaster,with high cheekbones and eyes framed with black lashes. I knew i was beautiful, it would have been futile to deny it, after all this is what immortality gave you. It took a little percentage of what you had before and honed and magnified a thousandfold.

The body was something to behold too, as i took in the high, full breasts, nipped in waist and legs that went on forever. At 5 foot 9 inches tall, i looked down on most people once the heels were in place! In reality i was 24 years old, but that was my previous life and this was my eternal life. My eternal damnation, i thought with a wry smile

As i pondered my reflection in the mirror, i realised a frown had marred the perfect symmetry of my forehead. Why was i so uneasy lately? I kept having a vague edgy feeling that was half fear and half expectant excitement. For what i didn't know. What i did know was that it was very unsettling, and i didn't like the feeling.

I felt the air shimmer slightly behind me and without looking around, i said " Hello Jacob"

He was beside me in the blink of an eye, wrapping me in a bear hug and planting kisses down my cheek. "Hello back! And how is my favourite girl?"

"I'm fine" i replied, kissing him back. Jacob Black was my dearest friend, and back in the day, one time lover. Time had diminished the sexual side of our relationship, although i sometimes thought that given half the chance, he would have liked us to become sexually involved once more.

Unfortunately, at least for him, i had become to think of him as a dear friend, and could never go back to what we once were.

Watching him in the reflection of my mirror as he stretched out on my bed, i sadly realised that it had only been lust anyway; love had played no part in the frantic coupling that we had shared. It had merely been a release from pent up emotions that had hid the dreadful loneliness that can strike at any time when you have been existing for so many years, exiled from humanity.

What was love anyway? I had never had the chance to experience it in my human life, and as a vampire, lust played too high a part in our existence. I had never even come close to knowing what love would be like. Would i recognise it if it happened? I had no answer to this.

I stared at Jacob, smiling fondly, and appraised his appearance as i had done recently to my own.

He too was tall but in a lanky way and was the epitome of what a film vampire should look like. Longish jet black hair swept back, arched eyebrows and eyes so dark they were almost black. Of course, handsome, but in a slightly sinister way; the amount of ladies that had fallen by the wayside was proof of that. He had a way of drawing them in without them understanding why.

There again, all vampires had this ability. The power we had over humans was so deliciously easy, but i had long given up that way of life. It had sickened me that i had had to take life to exist, so i turned "vegetarian" as i liked to call it and only killed animals.

I will admit, i have on various occasions, hastily broken into a blood bank or local hospital when i have left the craving to fester too long, but what's a vampire to do? I only took what i needed and left the humans still alive.

"Bella!..."Earth to Bella!" I jolted out of my reverie when i realised Jacob was calling me.

"Where did you go then? You were miles away!" he asked, staring at me in consternation.

"Sorry, Jacob, i seem to be in a funny mood today! I've been feeling...oh, i don't know...

"You've been feeling what?"

"Nothing" i replied, "Its nothing" "Just me being fanciful"

"O...kay, so what are we doing tonight?" he asked, playfully jumping off the bed and admiring himself in the mirror.

"We?" i said, looking at him with an arched eyebrow. "What's with the we?" "I was going out with Rose tonight. There is a group playing at Eclipse tonight and i wanted to see what they were like."

"Sounds fun!" I imagine there will be lots of pretty girls there" he said rubbing his hands together like melodramatic villain.

"You are incorrigible! But keep those teeth sheathed" i warned. "Of course" he retorted. You know i will behave, just let me have a little fun." All those human smells, it gets me all excited!" he said with relish.

The last thing i wanted was any trouble as i enjoyed living in one place for a lengthy time, or at least until someone started to notice i wasn't ageing. Jacob usually abided by my rules when he was staying in my vicinity. Luckily he was a nomad, travelling from casino to casino. His other great love, besides blood and women was gambling. He had an uncanny knack for playing the right cards and had amassed a large bank balance because of it. This was probably due to the sixth sense all vampires seemed to have.

I had the same luck on the stock exchange and my fortune easily overtook his. I "sensed" when to buy and sell and enjoyed the thrill of the ups and downs of the money market..It allowed me the freedom to move from place to place, and to be honest i loved to buy beautiful things.

Suddenly, there was a loud bang downstairs as a door crashed open and then "bollocks!" could be heard coming from a girlish high voice.

"Rose" Jacob and i both said together, sharing a smile.

Heavy footsteps could be heard coming up the stairs and then the bedroom door burst open and Rose stood there, hands on hips and a deep scowl on her face.

We both burst out laughing at the spectacle she presented. Her blonde hair was tied up with a scarf but an errant curl had escaped over her forehead. There was clay and dust over her pretty face and her dungarees were ripped and mud spattered.

"I have been working 4 long fucking weeks on that statue and it is not fucking working!" she exclaimed as with each expletive, the errant curl blew upwards. " I had to get outta that studio before i threw the goddamn thing on the fire!"

Rose was my flatmate, my confidante, my best friend. Without her i would have gone insane long ago. She was blonde too but shorter than me and much more voluptuous. With her short blonde curls and big dark blue eyes, she turned men's heads without trying. Especially when they heard the soft throaty way she spoke. Unfortunately, her girlish voice also came with a mouth that could floor a sailor.

She was a celebrated sculptor and i went through the agony of creation with her until the finished product was produced with a flair and a look that said;what was all the fuss about? Her pale face that mirrored mine was the only indication of her vampire condition. She had found me when i needed help and had been my mentor and friend ever since. I loved her unconditionally.

"Calm down Rose" "You know it will all work out in the end as it always does" I smoothed the curl away and gave her a hug.

"Jacob and i were talking about going to see that new group playing at Eclipse tonight" " That will take your mind off things and maybe give you some inspiration."

" At this moment in time, i can't think of anything i'd like better" " Musical inspiration" she sang, whipping off the scarf and doing a twirl. Luckily for us her moods were mercurial and usually ended on an upswing. "I'm off to get out of these clothes and into a hot shower. Then i will feel fucking human again!" With that, she put a hand up to her mouth and giggled like a child "Oops, guess not!" then she was out of the door and running down the stairs, calling up as she went "What are you wearing Bella?"" Do we need to go shopping?"

I sighed. Rose was such a...girl. I chuckled at the thought. We weren't going out until tonight and she was already discussing clothes and shopping, which besides creating beautiful works of art was her other love.

I shooed Jacob out of my bedroom with instructions to find something to do that wouldn't involve me or staying in, so he left muttering "women!" under his breath.

I wandered over to the window again. The sky was still grey and seemed to match my mood.

Shaking my head, i thought "snap out of it Bella, perhaps tonight will bring an end to this ...expectation."

Chapter 2

As we stepped out of the taxi, i could hear the thump, thump thump of the music blaring out of Eclipse nightclub doorway. I grinned at Rose and she returned my grin. We both felt that frisson of excitement at the expectation of a good night to be had by all. Jacob held the door open for us and we stepped into the foyer where the music blared even louder.

I handed my entrance fee to the girl at the counter and followed Jacob and Rose through the doorway into the main room itself. At least i went to walk through the door but was met with an almighty slam against my chest. I looked around, stunned, expecting to see someone holding a baseball bat, such was the force i had felt.

Rose looked over her shoulder and came up to me,seeing as i had stopped dead.

"What's the matter?" she asked, concern etched on her face.

I looked at her with amazement ; "Didn't you just feel that?

"Feel what?

"Some force just pushed me!"

"Pushed You?" "Actually pushed you?" disbelief in her voice.

"You haven't forgotten what you are, have you?" "Remember?" she said in a sarcastic tone as though speaking to a child "You can't be pushed?" " Anyway, there is no-one near you"

"Come on" exasperation colouring her tone, "we are supposed to be here for a good time."

"I don't know what's wrong with you lately" she added.

She grinned; "If i didn't know better, I would say it was fucking hormones!"

" Now move that cute ass of yours and get the drinks in!"

I moved slowly expecting to feel it again but this time nothing happened and i was able to weave my way through the crowds without difficulty.

We bought drinks even though we wouldn't drink them. Keeping up a human appearance had become second nature to us now. I tapped my foot in time to the music as the next song came blasting out of the speakers.

"This DJ is good" i yelled at Jacob as the music all but drowned out my words. He just nodded in agreement, eyes scanning the crowd. His eyes honed in on some young thing and signalling with his finger he pointed to where he was headed. I just rolled my eyes and waved my hand to usher him away. He really was a lost cause where women were concerned. He enjoyed the chase, the flirting, the power but at least no girls would lose their lives tonight. He had promised and would soon be moving on to fresh pastures.

I had tried to convert him to the "vegetarian" way of life and he had given it a go but it wasn't something he could enforce with any conviction. Only when he was visiting me did he agree to this condition.

Rose and i danced to a few songs, creating an audience of lusting young men all wanting a piece of the action. We were a sight to behold, two gorgeous blondes, one tall, one short, both moving to the music with a sexual sway in a ritual practised by all, since time began.

The DJ announced in nasal tones that the group Obsidian would be playing shortly.

Rose and i wandered back to the bar, picked up our drinks and waited for the group to come on.

I had that weird feeling again, but put it down to anticipation. As i looked up, so the band filtered onto the stage on by one.

The first was a big guy, and i mean a BIG guy; he stood about 6 foot tall but was as broad as a barn door. His huge muscles could be seen through the tight tee shirt he was wearing. He moved behind the drum kit, altering the seat for his large frame and then picked up the sticks.

Next was a fair, long haired guy, who bent over and picked up the bass guitar, shrugging the strap over his shoulder.

A young girl came next, petite, with short black spiky hair who immediately went to the microphone stand and adjusted it to her height.

Lastly a tall guy loped in. Immediately my throat tightened without any warning. I felt i was choking, which was silly because i didn't need air to breathe.

I stared at him and something shifted in me. Something off kilter.

I couldn't understand what was happening to me.

I looked around and everything was as it should be. Rose was standing beside me, oblivious to my

discomfort.

I stared up at the stage again and realised this had happened when the last guy had walked on.

By now he had slung his guitar over his shoulder and was busy adjusting it, tuning the strings.

He was tall, very tall, at least 6 foot 2inches and had broad shoulders and long, long legs.

His hair was a brown/bronze mix, thick and tousled, hanging over his forehead and the back of the collar on his leather jacket.

He looked up then and scanned the crowd and my body stilled.

He was, without question, the most beautiful man i had ever seen in my life.

My choking sensation eased off slowly as i stared up at him, raking my eyes over his body.

I couldn't make out the colour of his eyes as it was too dark in the club, but his mouth was wanted by women the world over and a cosmetic surgeons dream. Full bottom lip and a top lip that a dozen bees had landed on to give it that up-turned pouted lift.

They started playing and i left Rose's side and made my way slowly through the throng of swaying bodies to stand at the front of the stage.

The people loved them as they went through a couple of Bon Jovi covers, slung in a few Guns n' Roses for good measure and finished with some good old rock and roll.

The rest of the group went off for a break, leaving HIM standing there. He moved to the centre of the stage, dragging a stool behind him. Settling on it, steadying himself with one long leg out front he started to play his guitar and sing;

His voice was low, clear, sexy and soulful, the guitar notes mournful, and as he began to sing, his eyes closed and he was lost in the music, just him and his guitar alone on stage.

I was rooted to the spot, mesmerised at the raw sexual beauty that was in front of me and as the first note caressed the air, i felt something intangible snap in my chest;

You came out from the darkness,

and you brought me into the light.

I knew by my side you'd be waiting

When daylight turns into night.

Oh why did you wait so long?

When my love for you was so strong?

You are the soul i lost,

You are the soul i lost

Stay in my arms where you belong.

The agony i have felt each night

Tore my lonely heart in two,

but now you stand before me

Endless love i want to make with you

Your cool touch takes away my pain

Don't ever leave my side again

You are the soul i lost,

You are the soul i lost,

My love for you i cannot explain

I have been waiting, yearning and waiting,

Now you are finally holding my heart

Never ever to part oh..oh..oh...

My arms are the haven you seek

In my hands your heart i'll keep

You are the soul i lost,

You are the soul i lost,

Eternally yours, a love so deep.

There was a profound silence as the last notes died away, and then the crowd exploded.

He stood and accepted the rapturous applause with a shy smile. As he looked up to thank the crowd, our eyes met.

To say time stood still was an understatement. As i stared at that glorious face, the room just faded away.

He put down his guitar and jumped off the stage and walked toward me with a feline grace.

I couldn't move if my life had depended on it as he stopped in front of me and just...stared.

I looked up and saw his eyes were the colour of a storm lashed sea, fringed with lashes so long they cast a shadow upon his cheeks.

He gently put a hand on each side of my face, his long fingers reaching into my hair.

He had a perplexed expression on his face, mixed with one of wonder.

Slowly his head came down and his lips covered my own... To be kissed by a total stranger stranger was the most erotic thing i had ever experienced.

An electric zap shot through my body as his lips moved and i found myself returning the kiss with a fervour i had never felt before.

His tongue snaked through my lips ,and i felt my mouth open wider to accommodate it, all the while chasing his tongue with my own. His kiss was long, slow and deep and i groaned with the sensuality that assaulted my body. A delicious ache started deep down in my groin and spread up my body making my nipples harden and swell with each thrust of his tongue.

There was no music, no sound, no people. Just us in an act as old as time.

I finally heard someone calling my name..." Bella? What's going on?"

Reluctantly i pulled away, only to find he had trapped my bottom lip in his mouth. He sucked then released my lip and a shudder went through me. "Sweet Jesus" i thought, as awareness returned to me.

Rose was looking at me with a question on her face ;"Do you know this guy?" she asked, looking at both of us.

I'm ashamed to say we both ignored her, still staring at each other with stupid grins on our faces.

"Hello, I'm Edward Cullen, and you are?"

"Isabella Swan...I mean Bella"...

" Bella" he said, " That is Italian for beautiful. The name was made for you"

His voice was a mixture of silk and honey, encompassing me in its warmth.

By now the rest of the band had come back and he quickly looked up at the stage and then back at me. Reaching into his jacket pocket he produced a card and said "Don't leave until i finish the next set but if i lose you, ring me,... please" he said, a sense of urgency in his voice.

I took the card he handed me and watched as he walked back to the stage.

"God" i thought,staring at his retreating back, "even his ass is stunning"

By now Rose was standing, staring at me with her arms folded and one eyebrow raised.

"Are you going to tell me what the fuck is going on?" " Who was that guy? And more to the point why didn't i see him first?" she enquired with a leery grin.

"He said his name is Edward Cullen" i stammered. I had never felt more human and less like a vampire. My thoughts were all over the place and i knew i had to get out of here fast.

I turned to Rose and said "I have to go, stay here with Jacob, there's no need to come with me. I just need to think...i really need to get out of here. Okay?"

She could see i was near breaking point and with a concerned look, nodded and said " Go, ..go on, get out of here, I'll see you later, Yes?" I nodded my head in assent, and ran out of the club with just enough restraint not to warrant questioning looks.


	2. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I ran like the wind, and scaled the nearest wall up to the rooftop, leaping from roof to roof with ease. I wanted to escape from what I was feeling but eventually realised this was a futile exercise.

I stopped running and sat on a parapet overlooking the city.

The grey clouds had now gone from the sky, leaving it festooned with stars, each trying to out-sparkle the other.

I felt myself relax as I took in the city lights strung out before me like a fairy grotto.

Usually, when I needed to think, I came out at night, taking the time to gather my thoughts and stare at a moonlit sky, and boy, did I need to think tonight!

"What just happened?" I thought to myself. Maybe this was the reason why I had felt so edgy lately. My sixth sense had kicked in but without giving me any knowledge of what lay in store.

I brushed back my hair in frustration.

This man, this stunning man, was the first human I had ever kissed. He was the first human I had ever wanted to kiss. He was the first human I had wanted to kiss and not tear his throat out.

"This shouldn't be happening to me" I groaned aloud.

Why hadn't he felt my icy skin in his hands? There was no way I could get involved with a human. No way in hell.

"But I'm in hell without him" I moaned in anguish.

I paced up and down at the edge of the parapet, desperately trying to figure out what to do. I crouched down and peered over the edge, watching people the size of ants scurry around. Heights held no danger for me.

"Why?" I thought again, once more pushing my hair out of my eyes. "Why didn't I want to kill him? Why didn't he smell intoxicating to me? Why did all thoughts of feeding leave my mind and an all enveloping sense of completion...of peace take its place?"

The kiss returned to my thoughts, how I had groaned with the sexual pull it had made on my body, and the ache in my body returned. No human or indeed vampire had ever kissed like that.

I stopped with a start. " What would sex with him be like if just his kisses made me melt?" I pondered out loud.

"Nope, mustn't go there" I thought and shook my head to clear it.

I sat down again and pulled out the card he had given me.

It was an ivory, heavily embossed card, edged with black. On it was written in flowing italic print;

"Edward Cullen" and his mobile number underneath. Just that. No other information.

My fingers lightly touched over his name. I could feel the ink raised on the card and my skin felt warmer somehow. I knew this was just my imagination, but it made me feel close to him again.

I stayed deep in thought, pondering over the past events until the sky had a reddish hue and the stars had given way to the sun as it rose from above the horizon.

With a leap, I soared over the rooftops again, hurrying to be with Rose once more. She would be worried and I wanted to talk to her about what had happened.

What HAD happened? A cataclysmic event, that's what had happened.

My thoughts beat a tattoo in my head "What to do?" "What to do?"

Rose was waiting for me with arms folded, and an angry look on her face.

"Where the fucking hell have you been? Didn't you think I would be worried about you?"

She paced up and down, ranting and swearing until finally she stopped and looked at me with resignation in her eyes.

"Finished?" I asked. She didn't answer, just raised one eyebrow.

"I'm okay,... just so confused. I need your help Rose, not your anger. I have never felt this way before and I don't know what to do?"

She took me in her arms and hugged me, her angry mood instantly forgotten.

Stepping back, she looked me straight in the eye and said; "Right, now tell me all...I take it this IS about the guy last night?"..."Okay, okay, it is" when she registered my "You gotta be kidding me" look.

I began to explain to her all my feelings, my emotions, the unexplainable details that had happened when I was with him. She didn't understand either about my not wanting to feed on him. After all, with vampires it was all about the blood. First and foremost, the blood. It is all we crave, with lust coming a close second.

My only concern was this felt more than lust, but it couldn't be. Could it? After just one kiss?

As the morning lengthened and we were both no nearer to a solution, I took out his card and showed it to Rose. She gazed at it and handed it back.

" You're going to phone him, aren't you?"

I nodded. " I have to tell him that I can't see him, that we must never...

Rose interrupted me with a snort "Oh Pu-lease!" she said. "This is Rose you're talking to!"

" If you don't phone him, I am sure he'll get the message!

" I know!...I know" I said sadly. " I just need to hear his voice once more. Am I a pathetic specimen or what?"

"Yes you are" she agreed " But I love you anyway!"

I went into my bedroom and closed the door. I needed privacy for this call.

I slowly punched in the numbers on my phone and waited with anticipation for him to answer.

After a few rings I heard " Hello?" God, his voice still sounded like silk on the phone.

" Hello" I replied. " It's Bella" ..."from last night" I added, when he didn't answer straight away.

" Bella who?" he asked and I stood up and nearly dropped the phone. What! He didn't remember?

" Bella" I sputtered..."Um we...um...in the club" I was stammering like a sixteen year old on her first date.

I heard him chuckling down the line " Bella of course I know you, I would recognise your voice anywhere" " I was just teasing you!"

"What the fuck?" I thought " Teasing me? Didn't he realise how serious this was for me!"

But no, he wouldn't, sadly for me, he just thought I was an ordinary girl.

" So, when can we meet up?" he asked. " Would you have dinner with me tonight?

" I can't" I said, " When then?"he returned, Tomorrow night? Any night?"

"I meant I cant see you,... ever. " The sad longing in my voice was not lost on him.

Softly, like a caress he whispered " Bella, come see me tonight. Come to my house, we need to talk, if nothing else. I felt something with you last night that I have waited all my life to feel. Don't tell me you didn't feel it too?"

"I wanted that kiss to go on forever."

His voice melted over me like warm chocolate, sweeping away my last defences.

So, it had affected him too! I'm glad I wasn't the only one behaving like an idiotic love-sick fool!

When I didn't answer straight away, he added " I promise, I will be on my best behaviour...and I'll cook!"

I smiled, eating was the last thing on my mind!

"Okay, you win" I said, a catch in my throat. I knew this was crazy as I took down his address but I was crazy,... crazy for him.

I heard him sigh, and with a simple " Thank you Bella, you wont regret this, I'll see you at 7pm" he severed the connection.

I was already regretting it but I knew I had to go.

When I told Rose of my decision she archly replied " I really wasn't expecting anything different!"

She stared at me, a frown once more on her face " You haven't forgotten about your eyes, have you?"

Oh god, I had...with all the worrying, I had forgotten about the one thing I should worry about the most!

When vampires are feeding or over-excited, especially during sex, their eyes change in appearance, turning from their usual colour to a pale, unnatural icy blue colour, and the pupils change to the size of a black dot.

It is an eerie look, a "children of the damned" look, which essentially, is what we are. It is not for the faint-hearted and a chilling sight to see, completely changing your persona.

" Could I control this?" I wondered. Maybe it wouldn't happen with him, but I knew deep down that I was fooling myself.

"I will leave you with that thought, Isabella. I'm off to work on some clay, and you need to think about what you are going to do tonight!" and she swept out of the room, concern etched on her face.

I took my time dressing that night. I was torn between trying to look like a maiden aunt and a wanton seductress! I giggled as I knew which look I was heading for.

" Wanton seductress it is!"

"Maybe this time, I thought, things would be different and I would be the one seduced.

Selecting an emerald green sheath dress that accentuated my eyes and hugged every part of my body, I added a pair of 4 inch heels and stood back. "At least with these babies on my feet, we would see eye to eye" I chuckled nervously to myself. Inserting a pair of large, gold hoop earrings, a touch of lip gloss and a final flick of the hairbrush, i was ready.

The overall effect was classy and sexy...the look i had been trying for, so armed with matching handbag, i picked up my car keys and headed out of the door.


	3. Chapter 4

As I turned into his long driveway, approaching around a curve, the house suddenly appeared in view.

"Wow" I thought. "He must be doing okay just playing in a band."

The house was large, but modern, with patio windows and doors around the lower floor.

I got out of my car and walked to the door, trepidation in every step.

If I had had a heart, it would have been beating wildly.

I knocked and waited...and waited. I was about to knock again when I heard a disembodied voice shouting inside; " Hang on! I'm coming!"

The door burst open and there he was. As beautiful as I remembered.

I involuntarily took a step back.

"Oh fuck" was my first thought "He isn't playing fair"

He stood there, still dripping wet from the shower with just a white towel slung low on his hips.

"Come in, come in" he invited, "don't just stand there. I have to apologise, I was running late and I've just got out of the shower

I stepped past him, taking in the delicious mixture of soap and the added aroma of "Edward maleness," that perfect scent only he possessed.

He ushered me into the living room. It was a lovely room, all light and airy.

The furniture was black with cream walls. There were vases of white lilies in cut glass vases and strategically placed tables with ultramodern lamps that cast a warm glow.

He stood close to me and kissed me on the cheek.

"I'm so glad you changed your mind and decided to come," he whispered , leaning his forehead against mine.

I shivered at the close proximity of our bodies and he gave a throaty chuckle at my obvious reaction to him.

"I'm sorry, you bring out the little mischievous boy in me" he grinned as he backed away.

Automatically, I glanced down and my eyes must have widened as I heard another throaty chuckle escape from his lips. There was a slight curve now to the front of the towel that was unmistakeable.

" You are no little boy" I muttered, as he said he had better get dressed as he was dripping all over the carpet.

He walked away and I watched the rivulets of water run down his muscular back, finding a course around each individual muscle as he moved. The towel moved a little with the motion of his walk and two dimples appeared at his lower back, before the curve of each tight buttock was outlined by the towel. That loping walk reminded me of a jungle cat.

I had only spent minutes in his company and I was already panting like sick pervert.

I wandered around the room, picking up a photo here and there and trying to work out who they all were. The big guy who was the drummer in the band was in quite a few so I guessed he was a family member.

I felt his presence in the room again and turned around to find him watching me from the doorway.

His arms were raised above his head, holding on to the top of the door frame.

Now dressed in a white shirt and blue low slung jeans that hugged his long strong thighs, he exuded raw sexual power.

The sleeves of the shirt were rolled up revealing strong muscular arms covered in dark hair, and where his shirt had ridden up at the front, a dark trail of fine hair could be seen leading down to the waistband of his jeans.

Oh god...he was barefoot...and fucking mouthwatering...

"Would you like something to drink?" he enquired. "I have champagne cooling on ice"

"Are we celebrating something"I asked

"I think so, don't you?" he said as he made his way over to me. He looked down at the photo i was holding. Leaning his head over my shoulder, he said " That's Emmet, my elder brother. He plays drums in the band on the weekend but he is a fitness trainer and physiotherapist. Big, isn't he?"

I felt his breath against my cheek and edged away from him before I did something stupid.

" Yes, I remember him at the club."

Oh?" So your eyes weren't on me the whole time then?" he teased

"Are you fishing for compliments?" I teased back, looking him right in the eye.

His answer was to put a hand under my chin and softly kiss me on the mouth. He always took me by surprise...which was so erotic...

He moved so gently and yet it sent an exquisite sensation snaking through my body.

My mouth parted for him to gain access and his tongue entered my mouth with expert ease.

Our mouths moving as one, I could feel his full bottom lip over mine.

I wanted to reach up and thread my hands through his hair and sink into his body but I still needed breathing space to think what was happening to me, so I gently pulled away.

He looked at me with a quizzical expression but made no comment.

"What about that drink?" I asked.

He came back with two glasses of champagne and as he handed me one I asked him who the other band members were.

"The faired guy is Jasper, he's my best friend, we went through college together.

"The dark haired girl is his wife, Alice. They are both doctors, working at the same hospital."

"So if singing in a band isn't your only occupation, what is it that you do for a living?" i enquired.

"I'm a writer, i write Gothic novels, tales of mythology etc" he said with a false scary laugh.

I couldn't believe it, I felt as if I was in another dimension, Mythology! For god's sake!

"So you mean like vampires?" I said with a slight grin on my face.

"Yeah " he answered, "and werewolves and ghosts and things that go bump in the night. I love the mystery behind them all.",

"Ah, mystery,... i see."

Boy was I going to have fun with this or was I walking into dangerous territory?

"So in your books do vampires only come out at night and die when a stake is put through their heart?

"Yeah, all the usual stuff. With an exiting plot and a little sex thrown in, you have the making of a good story. Why do you ask?"

"Well there is something I have always wanted to know," I said.

"And what's that, pray tell?" he asked patiently.

"Why is it, when a vampires heart has already stopped beating, why will a stake through the heart kill it?"

He shrugged "I don't know, I've never really thought about that. It's just the way vampires have always been depicted"

"And the never going out in daylight" I added. "What's that all about?"

He chuckled, "Probably something to do with sleeping in coffins all day!"

"But vampires don't sleep" I said with conviction before I could stop myself.

He laughed, "Oh they don't, do they? And you have this on good authority?"

Thankfully he thought I was joking;"Yeah, my best friend is a vampire" I laughed.

I gulped and turned away to pick up my drink. If only he knew! Or not.

I grimaced as the champagne went down my throat. I could eat and drink a little but only in tiny amounts.

I put the glass down and felt his hand in my hair.

"You have beautiful hair" he said as he weaved his fingers through it away from my neck.

His face took on a serious look.

"From that first moment I saw you, I knew I had to be with you. I still feel that way now and I don't know why. I know you are beautiful, that goes without saying, but it's much more than that."

" Maybe we are meant to be!" I said half jokingly.

He didn't laugh, he just stared deep into my eyes and said " I think you may be right."

He brushed the hair from my neck and leaned in to kiss below my ear.

My breath hitched in my throat as his mouth continued on its way down my neck to my collar bone.

I knew where this was heading and I knew I should stop him but my body thought otherwise as I melted against him.

He felt so good in my arms. "I cant stay away from you any longer" I whispered.

"Then don't " he gasped as I started kissing and sucking his neck.

I knew i had to ask him an important question before i got too carried away.

"Does my skin feel alright to you?"

Your skin is soft, smooth and a delight to touch" he answered in between soft kisses on my shoulder.

I still couldn't understand why I didn't feel icy cold to him, but by now I was past caring, as all coherent thoughts went out of the window.

I moulded my body to him and I could feel him hardening against my thigh.

Sweeping me up in his arms he carried me upstairs.

He put me down in the middle of the room and pulled his shirt over his head in one swift movement.

I could only stare as I took in the broad chest sprinkled with dark hair and that trail leading ever downwards.

I walked towards him and undid the top button of his jeans, pulling apart the zip. I delved in and felt the length of him filling my hand.

He groaned and pulled me to him, his hand dragging down the zip at my back.

My dress fell to the floor and he undid my bra with one hand as he held my jaw with the other, plundering my mouth with his tongue again.

His hand came down and curved around my breast , cupping the weight and caressing with his fingers. They found my nipple and gently rolled and squeezed until it hardened and swelled under his touch.

I had my eyes closed and my head back as I felt him take one nipple in his mouth.

"Oh dear god" I thought, I can't stand it any longer but I didn't want him to stop...ever.

He laid me on the bed and shrugged out of his jeans.

He was wearing black boxer briefs, which he hooked a thumb in each side of and eased them down his body.

His erection sprang free and my eyes widened at the length of it. He gently pulled at my lacy panties and slid them down over my hips.

He leaned over me, balancing his weight on his hands as his mouth started another onslaught on my body.

"Christ, you're stunning" he said as he slowly kissed and licked his way down my body.

Dipping his tongue in my belly button, he moved on ever lower until his mouth was at the entrance to my sex.

"I want to taste you, I want to feel you with my mouth, with my tongue" he groaned as his hands moved down and gently parted my legs.

His head came down and _**I**_ felt his tongue inside me, his fingers opening me like a flower to the sun.

His tongue darted in and out sending shock waves through me, while his mouth sucked at my clitoris as he inserted one finger inside, then two.

I could feel a pressure building inside and he must have sensed it as he raised his head and said " Not yet, gorgeous, not yet."

Reaching over, I heard him rip open a foil packet with his teeth and roll the condom down his penis.

He moved up my body again, leisurely kissing as he went, until he was leaning over me again.

"Do you want me?" he demanded.

I nodded, my eyes still closed

"Say it!" he insisted "Say It out loud"

"I want you...God, do i fucking want you"

Before i had finished the sentence he plunged inside me, filling me up, then moving slowly, pulling his length out and then back in again in a steady rhythm.

He leaned on one arm and using the other hand his fingers found my nipple, squeezing and rubbing in time with every stroke.

Then his hand moved downward and he began circling my clitoris with his finger as he plunged deeper inside me.

I was writhing and lost to the sensations that were overtaking my body.

I loved the feel of him inside me, the way his fingers satisfied my every want.

Moving ever faster, the rhythm built up, his body rising and falling, as my body rose to meet his with equal passion. His breath coming faster, he would groan as each thrust took us both nearer the edge, then back again. We were both now teetering on the edge of an abyss that would send us crashing over the top.

From deep in my bones the tension started to rise , as the intensity built in my body and I knew my release would be coming soon.

He started moving faster and taking his hand away he lifted up my leg and somehow he entered me even deeper and i cried out as wave upon wave crashed over me in a never ending cascade of desire.

Thrusting even further i felt his body tremble as he craned his neck back and shuddered with a groan as he released himself inside me.

His body glistening with perspiration, he looked like a Greek god as he lay beside me.

"I knew we would be stunning together, baby. I just knew it."

I still lay there stupefied, hardly daring to believe what had just happened.

Amazing, wasn't the word. Mind blowing? It came close.

He reached up to take a swathe of hair from my face and i opened my eyes to look at him in awe.

" What the fuck!" he said as he sat up, staring down at me.

" Your eyes! What the hell's wrong with your eyes?"

I cringed, and for one moment i was turned to stone. I didn't know what to do.

I reached up and covered my eyes with my hands, then suddenly realising i couldn't stay like that, i dashed off the bed, grabbing my clothes as i went.

I was out of the door before he had chance to move.

I could hear him calling "Bella! Wait! Come back!" but I wouldn't have been able to give him an explanation to my condition.

I managed to get to my car, and roared down the drive.

It was now i wished i could cry. The torture i felt, the anguish, that for one moment I thought I could get away with it.

To love and be loved.

To not be looked at as though I was a monster.

His eyes for one brief moment had looked at me like that, and that i will never forget.

I must also never, ever forget what I was.

I was a soulless vampire.


	4. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

How I got back home without killing anyone was a minor miracle. I could hear Rose and Jacob arguing, then Rose's playful laugh filtered into the air and I knew they were just messing about.

That was me a couple of days ago, I thought.

Blissfully unaware, going about my business, like I had for the last couple of hundred years or so.

Although, on reflection, something had bothered me. Next time...NO!..." No next time!" I shouted to myself. Absolutely no more humans for me,... nope, never again. Not going to happen.

Then his face came unbidden to my mind, his body next to mine and the love, yes love, we had made. I sunk my head into my hands and wailed.

I still wanted him so much...how was I ever going to get through this?

A powerful vampire, i reasoned...turned to jelly.

And there was me thinking you only had to take the head of a vampire to kill it. This was torture and I was dying slowly, but dying nevertheless.

I went inside and went straight to my room. Taking off my clothes, I threw my dress on the floor. I could never wear it again without thinking of him. Donning sweat pants and a top, I lay on the bed. Even though I knew it was impossible, I felt exhausted. Wrung out like an old dishcloth.

A soft tap came at the door; "Bella, can I come in?"

"Yeah, Rose."

As the door slowly opened, I added "But if you say I told you so, I shall throw you out of the window!"

She just got on the bed and lay down beside me. As we lay there together in silence, I felt her small hand reaching to clasp mine, and this simple gesture of love and affection sent me right over the edge.

I turned to her, and her arms enfolded me in a tight embrace as I cried long into the night. No tears were shed, as I didn't have the luxury of working tear ducts, but I wept anyway.

When morning came, the clouds were back and rain drizzled against the window.

I stared outside thinking this weather matched my mood. Grey and miserable.

My mobile phone rang and I checked who was ringing... Edward!

I let it ring, waiting for the notes to die away. I couldn't speak to him. What would i say?

"I had a great time last night, oh and by the way, my eyes are weird because I'm a vampire? You know, those scary fanged monsters you write about? Small world, eh?"

My message tone started then, and I scrolled to see what he had written;

"Bella, please don't run away from me. We can work anything out if we try. You have to trust me. PLEASE call me back, love Edward xxx"

"Oh god" I thought, as I started pacing up and down. "Didn't he realise it was ME I couldn't trust?"

I turned my phone off and threw it on the bed.

Sitting at my work desk, I brought up Google and typed in "Edward Cullen" It registered quite a few names but one stood out in particular;

"Edward Cullen, the famous Gothic mystery writer, is best known under his pen name of Carlisle Masen"

"Holy fuck!" I exclaimed.

Carlisle Masen? He was fucking Carlisle Masen?"

Famous was an understatement. No wonder he had that big beautiful house. I scanned everything that was written, learning that a few of his books had been turned into films. I had even seen one of them, for god's sake! Unfortunately, I had been the only one laughing when stakes were being plunged into chests and sunlight burnt the vampires to ash.

Never having bought one of his books I hadn't known what he looked like. I tended to steer clear of vampire novels as I always felt a compelling urge to write and inform the authors in no uncertain terms of the mistakes they were making.

I leaned back in my chair and put a hand to where my heart should be. The ache was still there, as though a hole had been punched in my chest. The agony and ecstasy of love...so bittersweet, so all consuming, like a fire simmering slowly, ready to burst into flames at any moment.

Realising I had to do something to rid me of this godawful pain, I decided to go to our place in the country. Rose agreed to come with me as she needed a break and time to re-charge her batteries.

Besides we needed to get something to eat.

The woods near the cottage where we stayed was teeming with wildlife, and so for the next week or so we hunted. All my love sick ideas were banished from my thoughts as I concentrated on the business of catching wild deer and feasting on their blood. I only needed to do this once every couple of weeks, but the misery I was feeling made me take buck after buck until Rose told me to ease up before I decimated the whole herd.

We also talked long into the night about everyday things, as women have done the world over, but never once mentioning Edward's name. I think during this time, Rose thought this would be a healing process for me, but in reality, Edward was never far from my thoughts.

Tragically, I had to forget him, there was no other solution.

On our return, I found a message left on my answer machine. I pressed the button and a voice I didn't recognise filled the air;

"Oh..hi...Um...You don't know me...I'm a friend of Edward's...uh...Jasper...Look, I know its none of my business, but the guy is hurting...Christ, he'd kill me if he knew I was telling you this...So, do you think you could just call him?...I mean, I don't know what went wrong, but nothing can be that bad, right?...Um, sorry to have bothered you...probably think I'm nuts...I just don't like seeing him like this...well,... anyway,... sorry to ramble on...hate fuckin' machines," he muttered as he put the phone down and the message ended.

I stood still for a long time. He was in pain,...the deep ache in my chest swelled.

I played back the message again. He was hurting, I was hurting. Could something be done? Would he still want me if he knew the truth? I remembered the horrified look he had given me when he first saw my eyes change. I didn't want to see that look again.. ever.

One message and I was in turmoil again. Maybe...just maybe... if I just went back to the club and saw him again, listened to him sing?

Rose would kill me, I know. She hated seeing me so upset and being unable to help.

I went downstairs to the studio she had out back and sat and watched her as she deftly carved a horse's head out of a lump of clay.

"Uh Rose, I've been thinking"

"Thinking eh? Now that's a first, just lately!" She softened the harsh words with a smile in my direction.

"Why do I get the feeling nothing fucking good will come from this? Pass me that knife will you?" she said, pointing to a work bench. I leaned over to get it, glad of the time it gave me to think. Of how she would she take the news.

"I've decided to go and see Edward again" I blurted out.

She dropped the knife she was holding, which was a true indication of how shocked she was. Vampires never drop anything.

"You're fucking what?"

I'm going to see..." "Yes, I bloody heard you the first time, you idiot...you fucking idiot!"

Running her hands through her hair in desperation, she succeeded in transferring more clay to her face.

"You cannot go to see him again! What on earth will that accomplish, huh?"

He is a friggin' human for god's sake! Do you think he will want you if he finds out the truth?"

"Why would you put yourself through all this again?"

" I can't believe this...I cannot fucking believe this!"

"I just want to see if somehow we can work something out," I pleaded. I started pacing up and down too now. "I need to be with him Rose. He is the other half of my whole" I cried. "I feel so lost without him"...I came to a sudden stop in front of her. "Maybe if he knows what I am?"...we can...

She interrupted me with a yelp; " You're going to tell him?...I mean you can't... you just can't do that!"

" Why not?" I snapped back. "Who would it hurt? only me if he decides he doesn't want me."

"Who would it hurt?...who do you think it would hurt?" she yelled. Her arms were held wide from her body as she remonstrated with me.

"You, me, and Jacob for starters. We would have to move and I happen to like it here!"

"Why would we have to move?" I questioned. I couldn't understand her reasoning.

" Because my silly naive love sick child, if the idea of us existing scared the shit outta him, then the first place he would go would be the police. I'm sure Jacob would love that, him being of the "carnivorous" persuasion!"

"Rose, he just wouldn't do that, I know he wouldn't." Hesitantly,I took her hand in mine."Please let me try this? I have never wanted anything more in my life." I said simply.

She pulled her hand from mine." You do what you have to do, Bella, but I wash my hands of it. Just don't coming running back to me when your life is shattered in a million pieces.

"Nothing good will come of this" she added. "Perhaps you need to see this for yourself."

I stormed out of the studio, cannoning into Jacob on his way in.

" Hey! I could hear you two half way across town!" he stated. "What's going on?"

I didn't answer. Rose could do all the explaining needed.

I was fed up with listening to people tell me what I could and couldn't do.

Maybe it was time to take that step into the unknown. If this all ended tit's up then at least I would know that I had tried.

Anyway, what was I without him?

A very lonely, vampire.

I kept out of Rose's way until Saturday night came around. She knocked on my bedroom door just before I was setting out.

"I wanted to see you before you go" she said. "If anything happened to you tonight and the last thing I remember is me shouting at you...well I would never fucking forgive myself."

I was holding her in a tight hug before she had finished her sentence.

"Oh Rose, I hate it when we fight and I know you are doing it for my own good, but I really need to do this, okay?"

"Okay" she mumbled, giving me a quick squeeze and was gone before I could see her upset again.

Standing outside Eclipse again, I could hear the loud music thumping through the door.

I was steeling myself to go in. Squaring my shoulders I walked through the door to be met by a wall of sound.

As I had come to the decision to tell him the truth, I thought a more "vampire" attire was required.

I wore a black long sleeved top, showing plenty of cleavage, over a pair of back skinny jeans.

Knee high black boots completed the look. My hair hung long and sleek down my back and a black choker necklace adorned my neck, matching the black hoop earrings.

Obsidian were in the middle of their set. I stood at the back, listening to them play. There were too many swaying bodies in the way for me to see the band but I could hear Edwards unmistakeable voice.

They had just finished a song, and I heard Edward drag the stool to the middle of the stage.

My skin went even colder as I heard him say into the microphone:

"This song is a favourite of mine by Richard Marx. It's for all you people out there that have loved and lost."

He settled on the stool and his soft soulful voice filled the room;

Nothing I must do

Nowhere I should be

No one in my life

To answer to but me

No more candlelight

No more purple skies

No one to be near

As my heart slowly dies

If I could hold you one more time

Like in the days when you were mine

I'd look at you 'till I was blind

So you would stay

I'd say a prayer each time you smile

Cradle the moments like a child

I'd stop the world if only I

Could hold you one more time.

The crowd broke into rapturous applause again.

I felt rooted to the spot. He had been singing that song just for me.

The words filled me both with sadness and with elation.

Surely, if he felt this way, he would still want me, no matter what I was?

I made my way through the crowd with a singular determination. He had just put his guitar down in readiness for a break, when he looked up and saw me there.

So many expressions worked there way over his face it was hard to keep up.

Utter surprise was first, followed by disbelief, followed by joy as his face split into a huge grin.

He leapt off the stage in a single bound and swung me around in his arms. Everyone started clapping and cheering as he put me down, took my face in his hands and kissed me with an intensity that brought me to my knees.

" I don't care about why you ran away, I don't care if you don't love me."

He held my gaze with his own and a steely tone came into his voice; " All I DO care about is you, that you came back, that you are here with me now, so don't EVER fucking leave me again, Okay?"

"Okay?" he emphasised again, as he gently shook my arms.

I took in his beautiful face that i had missed so much. "How could I give up this man?" I asked myself. His eyes were alight with happiness and those perfect lips curved upward in a smile.

I smiled, or rather I grinned from ear to ear.

"Okay" I agreed... " I love it when you're masterful!" I added cheekily.

" Masterful, eh?" "I'll show you fucking masterful!"

He dipped down and slung me over his shoulder to the appreciation of the crowd. They hooped and hollered as he walked up to the stage with me hanging upside down and my ass in the air.

I wish I could have seen Jasper's face, because I could hear him laughing along with the rest of the band.

"I take it we have to finish this one without you?" Jasper yelled, chuckling at the same time.

"Too damn right!" Edward said, grinning."I got me some catching up to do!"

As he turned around and strode out of the club, still with me over his shoulder, I could hear Jasper shouting;

"Way to go Edward,... way to go!"


	5. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

We got back to his house in record time. We never spoke a word the whole way, just a few sideways glances at each other and a matching smirk on both our faces that was hard to keep under control.

Edward swerved to a stop outside his front door, kicking up a load of gravel as he did so.

Walking with that swift lope I had begun to know and love, he had the car door open before I realised.

Holding his hand out like an old fashioned gentleman he said ;" Madam? May I take your hand?"

My laughter was bubbling under the surface as I replied in a false haughty tone, " Why yes, kind sir!"

As he helped me out, he bent down and once again hoisted me over his shoulder.

"What the...?" I cried, as I wasn't expecting this at all. "Will you put me down this minute!"

"Nope, and you can argue all you want, but I'm not letting go of you until you are safely in my bed!"

I grinned to myself. I knew I could easily have evaded his vice-like grip but I was enjoying myself far too much.

"Let me go!" I cried again, kicking my legs. I could do girly, damsel in distress with style!

He smacked me lightly on the ass and just said "Shut up, woman, stop your moaning otherwise I will give you something to moan about"

I slightly turned my head, which wasn't an easy thing to do upside down, and sweetly asked " Is that a promise?"

I felt him stagger slightly at my words, and then he was through the door and up the stairs in a flash.

He kicked the bedroom door shut behind him with his foot and dropped me unceremoniously on the bed, before I had to chance to say another word.

Quickly leaning over me, he breathed " So what was that about promises?"

I didn't answer his question, I just took his face in my hands and said " Come here, you."

This time _I_ kissed him.

My mouth opened, my tongue seeking out his like a heat seeking missile. All the pent up emotion I had been keeping in check these past few weeks came pouring out and into that kiss.

My tongue traced an outline over his and I sucked his bottom lip before pulling away.

The tender look on his face was nearly my undoing.

"So", he said gruffly, "I take it you missed me then?"

I went to hit him with a pretend slap but he caught my hand and put each finger in his mouth, sucking them with a sensual touch.

A swift stab of desire went winging down my body, settling between my legs.

"I can think of a better use of your hand instead of hitting me" he muttered seductively, all smiles gone now as his mouth moved from my fingers and began a leisurely stroll from my wrist up to the crook of my elbow, planting feather-like kisses along the way.

My voice broke as it suddenly dawned on me what would happen again, " My eyes...I stammered, "about my eyes..."

"Forget your eyes" he murmured. "We will talk about your eyes soon enough, but for tonight, let's just concentrate on us, that we're together right now and nothing else matters."

With each kiss he placed upon my neck, he breathed " You... are...all...that...matters...to...me."

Nuzzling my neck, his mouth slowly moved down my body, undoing each button on my blouse as he did so.

A longing so intense swept through me again and I grabbed at his shoulders and in one swift movement, flipped him over so he was underneath me. His eyes widened in surprise and shock but I could see from his face it excited him.

His breathing quickened as, with rampant haste, I ripped open his shirt, the buttons flying everywhere.

Instantly my mouth was at his neck, kissing and licking, moving downwards with butterfly kisses as I ran my fingers through the fine dark hair on his chest.

My lips found his nipple and he moaned softly as I sucked it into my mouth. Undoing his jeans, he shimmied out of them as I quickly rose and stripped out of mine. My panties joined his boxers on the floor.

Kneeling astride him, I stared down at his naked body, all the while taking in the curve of his shoulder, the breadth of his chest, the six pack of muscles that perfectly aligned each side of his belly button. I traced one finger down the trail of fine hair that curled underneath where I was sitting.

His eyes closed and his head went back and he groaned again.

I leaned over and whispered with a low gutteral voice in his ear ..." I ..want.. to.. _suck_.. you."

"Fucking hell, Bella!" he moaned, the dirty talk exciting him as much as my actions.

My tongue moved down his body while my hand found his erection. Strong and long, my fingers caressed its length, marvelling at the size of it beneath my hand.

My mouth eagerly closed over the top as I gently sucked, and his body writhed beneath me.

Without warning, I completely took him into my mouth, feeling the warm veins beneath my lips, as he shuddered against me. Moaning softly, his hands were in my hair, gripping it tightly.

Having no gag reflex, I took all of him in; my throat and tongue undulating against him.

I held his balls in my hand as I slowly lifted my mouth and plunged down again.

I loved the feel of him in my mouth, I loved the length of him, I loved tasting his velvet skin in smooth even strokes.

I felt his hand on my head as he gasped "Fuck, Bella, as much as I am loving this, there will be nothing left for you if you carry on."

With one last caress, I slowly took my mouth away and climbed with a sensuous crawl back up his body.

"Well, we can't have that, can we?"

"Wait" he said and he leaned toward the bedside table, trying to open the drawer. I knew what he was searching for and stopped his hand with mine.

"Will you trust me?" I asked, " I want to feel you and there really is no need."

Nobody knew better than I, that a condom was superfluous to me and not needed by him.

I leaned back over him, feeling his hand go between my legs and finding the velvet softness.

His questing fingers found my inner core and rubbed gently in a circular motion on the swollen nubbin found there. I gasped as he inserted his fingers, moving them inside me with little flicks.

He opened me up and rubbed that delicious spot just inside the entrance, making me shudder.

Slowly, I slid back onto his waiting erection and he filled me up with one stroke.

He held out his hands to me and I braced against them as my body rose and fell.

My thighs gripped him as I rode up and down, each thrust more exquisite than the last.

Letting go of his hands, I leaned back, taking him in further. His breath caught in his throat as he saw me raise my arms and lift my hair from my neck, causing my breasts to strain forward.

I was lost in the sensation of him inside me, filling every part of me.

This time _I_ was in control, as each measured movement brought us to the brink and back. I leaned right back, placing my hands behind me on his thighs, feeling the strong muscles bunch to steady me as I rose and fell. My head fell right back as I started to moan, a low growl beginning in my throat.

He rose up to meet each thrust I made, a perfect synchronised harmony.

I leant forward again, wanting to see him, the sheen of sweat on his perfect body enhancing every sinew as he strained to prolong the ecstasy, not wanting it to end.

I wanted to watch him as he came inside me.

Feeling the pressure build within, the tell-tale ache rose and threatened to engulf me.

As my movement took me up, he put his fingers between my legs again and caressed and rubbed, and I came in a shuddering cry "Fuck... me... Edward, ...don't...don't stop...don't stop...

He grabbed my hips and with one last thrust, his head went back and his body convulsed as he emptied himself into me. The veins in his neck stood out, as with his eyes tightly closed, he groaned and said my name over and over.

In one languid motion, I collapsed back down on him, totally spent.

We just lay there, his arms holding me, till our breathing returned to normal.

I slipped off him and lay on my back, my arm slung over my eyes.

Sensing my anxiety, he waited, giving me the time I needed to collect my thoughts.

After a short while, he pulled me into his arms so my head was cradled on his chest.

"Bella, I want to ask you something, is that okay?"

I nodded, still averting my eyes.

"Have you ever murdered anyone?" he asked, taking me totally by surprise.

"What on Earth made you ask me that?" I gasped.

"Trust me okay? Have you?" he asked again.

" No!" I replied indignantly. Even though I drank blood, I had never had to kill anyone to get it. It went against my nature to be like that.

" Are you married?"

"No!"

"Are you gay?"

I spluttered at this, "Um let me think about this question...Duh... I don't think so"

Edward scolded me "I am trying to be serious here!"

"Sorry, it's just that after...well...what we just...y'know...it seemed kinda ...laughable?"

I peeked up at him and caught a grin tugging at his mouth.

"So" he continued, trying to be stern again "You haven't murdered anyone, you're not married and you're not gay. Is that correct?"

I nodded again and said meekly, " Yes, it's all true. Where exactly are you going with this?"

"I'm just trying to let you know that whatever else you have to tell me, it wont matter. Your eyes can turn sky blue pink and your skin change into stripes after we make love, and it won't matter.

He put his hand under my chin and gently raised my face up to his.

"Look at me Bella."

I slowly opened my eyes, revealing the scary looking icy blue hue.

" Bella, you don't know how long I have waited for you."

We were now face to face, lying side by side, as he gazed at me with a tenderness that made me want to weep.

With a catch in his voice he said "I love you Bella, you are my life now.

I stared at him in silence, not wishing to break the spell.

He loved me! Would he still love me when I told him the truth about me?

"Edward, I love you more than life itself. I have loved you from the first moment I saw you."

He went to interrupt me but I quickly silenced him with my finger to his mouth. If I didn't get this out now, I would never be able to summon the courage later.

My hand brushed his hair from his face as I contemplated how to begin.

"God, where do I start?" I said with a nervous laugh.

"The beginning is always best, I find" he said with a tender smile."Bella, don't be afraid."

I took a deep breath and started telling him my story;

"I was hurrying home from my friends house; we had been picking the material for the bridesmaid dress I was to wear at her wedding. Unfortunately, we were both so engrossed in the task that we didn't notice the lateness of the hour."

If Edward noticed I had slipped into the way of speaking of an earlier time, he never commented, letting me finish my story.

"I left her house as dusk was falling and the shadows were starting to lengthen."

"Scurrying around a corner with my head down, I was within 30 yards of my home, when I literally bumped into a man.

Tall and thin, dressed all in black, he towered over me, gripping my arms as he steadied me."

I shivered at the age old memory and Edward held me tighter.

"So Isabella, you are out late tonight, he said, "you should be home, snug in your bed." He spoke in a strange mesmerising tone.

"I asked him how he knew my name, and he told me he could tell just by holding me. Of course I didn't understand what he meant and I tried to get away from him."

"He held me in a vice like grip of steel and I found I couldn't move. "I am going to enjoy you, Isabella, and he opened his mouth, revealing glistening long teeth."

Edward by now was as still as a statue, hardly daring to breathe as he listened to my story.

"I knew then I was in the presence of evil, and that without doubt he was going to take my life.

His eyes glittered then with a strange pale blue colour and I recoiled in horror.

I still don't know to this day why he didn't kill me, but as his lips curled back in a feral snarl, I simply asked him..."Why do you want to kill me?... Why me?"

"For some reason, he hesitated and pulled his head back up sharply.

His head tilted to one side, he contemplated me with a long stare, the icy blue eyes knitting together in a frown.

His head went back and he laughed mirthlessly, the deadly sound making the hair on my neck stand on end.

"Isabella! What a good question! I applaud you. No-one has ever asked me that!" I could see him pondering on what to do next.

"Perhaps I shall spare you after all. You have caught me in a benevolent mood and not a malevolent one, he grinned evilly. His tongue came out and he licked up my face with a sigh, as I desperately tried to evade him.

"You taste divine, and I believe you are much too beautiful to live as a pitiful human. I think you would make an excellent subject in the art I practice."

The last memory I have is of his cruel face bearing down on me, and the sound of a loud terrifying roar.

"The rest I don't remember. I woke up behind an old warehouse, many miles from my home.

I was ravenously hungry and my clothing was wet and dirty and dried with blood."

I stopped talking then, holding myself so still as I waited for the inevitable question.

"How old are Bella?"

"I hesitated..." I am twenty four."

He waited two beats before asking quietly, "And when did all this take place?"

I sighed and just as quietly said " The 2nd of October ... 1836.


	6. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The only sound in the room was the ticking of the clock that stood on his window sill.

As the silence lengthened, a sob escaped from my mouth and I went to rise from the bed.

Immediately a pair of strong arms restrained me, pulling me back. I allowed him to move me as I just wanted to be with him, but his silence filled me with trepidation.

"Bella, I'm sorry, but you have to understand this has completely floored me." He ran his fingers through his hair as he looked at me in awe.

"I need a drink" he said with a wry twist to his mouth. He picked up his jeans from the floor where they had been thrown earlier. I bent to retrieve my clothes and we dressed in silence.

With a look of utter sadness I gazed at his face, my mind in turmoil. My sigh must have been quite loud as he wrapped me in his arms, murmuring "Don't be upset Bella, I told you before, you and I are all that matters, so we will go downstairs and I will get that stiff drink and we will talk this over together."

He took my face in his hands, "Okay? We are in this together, remember?" he turned me around and patted me on the ass as he propelled me through the door.

Downstairs we faced each other at the dining table. He turned his drink round and around in his hand as he formulated in his mind what he wanted to ask.

"I bet he must have a thousand questions swirling around in his brain and doesn't know which one to ask first," I thought, as the furrow between his brows deepened.

"So, even though I am going to say this out loud, my mind is still refusing to accept it..."

"You are a vampire?"

I just nodded, I was too scared to speak.

"I'm sorry I have to ask this, but do I need to be afraid?"

"No!" I exclaimed. "I would never hurt you, I have never wanted to hurt you!" He must have heard the anguish in my voice because he quickly said, "It's okay Bella, I believe you."

He took another sip of his drink before saying..."Um...there is another very important question I have to ask you."

"Ask me anything, please" I pleaded. I hated it that I was causing all this worry.

He hesitated at first, showing his fear at the possible answer.

"Do you kill people Bella,... do you kill them and drink their blood?"

I flew out of the chair and knelt at his feet, clutching both his hands in mine.

"No!" I cried. "I have never done that, I have never wanted to!"

Agony crept into my voice as I desperately tried to convince him of this. He pulled me up onto his lap and held me tightly, all the while soothing me with soft words. "Hush Bella, It's okay, it's okay, don't get upset, I hate it when you're upset."

"But I don't ever want you to be afraid of me," I wailed. I love you so much, if I lose you now because of this, I don't know what I'll do." I cried again, my arms tightening around his neck.

"Bella, Bella, don't worry, okay? I'm not going anywhere. You have got me whether you want me or not." he said, a grin lighting up his face. "Actually, you had me right from the beginning."

My tremulous smile mirrored his own as I took in his words.

"Uh... Bella?" "Yes?" I answered. "Can you let go of my neck now? You're starting to choke me!"

"Oh god Edward, I'm so sorry,...see? I don't know my own strength!"

"You are very strong then?" he queried. I thought action would speak louder than words, so I got off his lap, bent down and picked up the chair,

still with him in it, with my one hand. I put him gently back on the ground and his face was a picture. So many expressions crossed his face as the plethora of adjectives fought there way to the surface.

He settled simply for ; "Wow"

We talked endlessly, comfortable with each other at last. So many questions were thrown at me. His voracious appetite for all things supernatural at the forefront of his mind.

I answered queries about my "vegetarian" mode of eating, my many talents in the strength and speed department and when he asked if I could turn into a bat, it took me at least a half an hour to stop laughing.

I told him of our innate ability about sensing things; the sixth sense we had and how it helped me with decisions in my life.

I also told him how I liked to walk the rooftops at night, the peace and serenity it brought me.

"Don't you sleep?" he asked, amazed.

"No I don't... ever" I replied. "Sleeping in coffins is a myth, I added. " So is burning in sunlight, not having a reflection, a fear of garlic and holy water and being killed by a stake through the heart."

"Does this mean then that you can never die?"

"Oh no, well not die exactly as I am dead already." He flinched as I said this and I thought "I must remember not to speak so bluntly, as I have had hundreds of years to get used to this; he had only discovered my secret today."

"There is only one way for our kind to die and that is to take their head."

He gulped, and I quickly went to him and placated him with the usual platitudes of "Its never going to happen, don't worry."

Dawn started to lighten the night sky and I realised we had talked all night. I saw Edward stifle a yawn and rub his eyes sleepily.

"C'mon you, you need some sleep. I will still be here when you wake."

"No. I'm fine, I couldn't sleep now, I'm too wired."

"Well try anyway, otherwise you will be useless later on and I want you to meet my friends tonight."

"Vampire friends?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Of course, who else?" I laughed.

He fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, exhaustion etched on his face. I lay by his side, my head on his chest, listening to his heart beating a steady rhythm against my face.

As his breathing deepened, I lifted myself off the bed without disturbing him, drinking in the sight of him. His hair fell over one brow and his eyelashes made two half moons against his cheeks. His lips parted slightly and a soft sigh escaped. I hoped he was dreaming of me.

"You are mine." I marvelled at the thought. This gorgeous, loving man had entered my life and turned it upside down, never to be the same again.

"I wouldn't want it any other way" I thought.

While Edward was sleeping, I took the opportunity to get back to Rose as I'm sure she would be anxious and giving me hell.

As it wasn't quite light yet, I took the easy route over the roof tops where no-one could see my unearthly speed.

Rose was in her studio again, her face a picture of concentration. She looked up as I entered, scrutinising my face for any tell tale signs of misery.

I couldn't keep the exultation out my voice as I danced towards her shouting "He knows and he still loves me!"

I hugged her and twirled her with me until she pulled out of my grasp with a snort.

"I always knew you were fucking crazy but I am happy for you, hon."

I laughed out loud and under her persistent questioning, regaled her with all the details of what had happened last night. The lovemaking details I hugged to myself.

I asked her if it would be okay to bring Edward to meet her as she was the closest I had to family, and she said she would ask Jacob to join us too, as knowing Jacob as we did, he would want to check him out.

"He wont be a problem, will he?" I nervously asked, as we did share a history together and a sexual history at that.

"I don't think so, Rose said, "If I didn't ask him he would feel deeply hurt and I don't want to alienate him toward Edward right from the start."

I could see the wisdom of this and so we made arrangements for that evening, agreeing to meet at 7pm.

It was almost 10.30am as I drew up at Edwards house and making sure there was no-one about, I scaled the wall outside his bedroom and entered through the open window.

He was still asleep, his arms under his pillow, laying face down.

He had kicked the covers off and the sight of him took my breath away. Would this effect he had on me ever wear off, I wondered? I smiled to myself,... I fervently hoped not.

His back rose with every inhalation, the muscles moving under his skin with a sinuous grace. The dimples at the curve of his back made me want to kiss them and his tight firm behind would put any Greek statue to shame. The long legs were covered in a layer of thick hair and his bare feet twitched in sleep.

I was amazed this man was human as he already had an unearthly beauty to him. What would he look like as a vampire, I wondered, when all beauty is enhanced. This was something I hoped I would never know, as my existence was not a condition to be yearned for.

I quickly removed my clothes and climbed in next to him, taking care not to disturb him.

In sleep, he gravitated toward me, like a homing beacon, and I snuggled up against him, revelling in the feel of his firm body.

"Mmmm Bella" he murmured sleepily, his voice low and deep.

I was facing him, my head under his chin when he turned me away from him. "Woah what have I done wrong?" I wondered.

Before I could ask him, he had pulled me back against him, spoon -wise.

"That's better" he crooned, lifting my hair from my neck to kiss it.

I stretched against him, feeling his manhood pushing into my back, seeking an entrance as though it had a mind of it's own.

"So, it would seem you are awake" I stated, as his hands came around and cupped each breast.

"No" he chuckled, "this is a dream , and as its _my_ dream, you must be a willing participant in all my desires."

"Ooh, so what is your desire, oh master? I asked with a sultry tone.

"Don't move, I just want to try one thing."

I tingled all over at what he would do as his hands continued to hold and feel my breasts, his fingers rolling my nipples till they peaked.

His hands slowly moved away from my breasts, down my body to the cleft in my legs, seeking out my opening with probing fingers. I went to feel him behind me but he whispered against my ear "No!, don't move, stay very still. In my dream I want to explore every inch of you, and you must answer to my every whim.

I shivered, this "dream" of his was intoxicating!

His fingers entered me at the front, opening me up and I lifted one knee in anticipation.

His other hand felt my behind, his fingers curving around it and dipping into the crease up the middle. In circular motions, his fingers got ever nearer to meeting in the middle of me, and as he continued to rub and fondle at the front, I felt one finger gently slip into my behind.

I bucked as the electric shock zapped through my body, an unbelievable feeling so intense, so fucking erotic, sent me straight over the edge into the purest oblivion.

I couldn't seem to stop, as wave after wave washed over me. Multiple orgasms ripped through my body as I shredded the sheets under me, no longer able to contain any semblance of normality.

Without giving me any chance to relax, he removed his fingers and thrust into me from behind, filling up my willing waiting vagina with a fullness only he could. I pushed against the bedside cabinet, bending over to give him a better entry. I was wild now, as I bucked and thrust my body against his. The table broke into pieces as I pushed again but I was past caring now as I could feel that familiar feeling rising in me again.

Edward was crying out now as he could feel my insides start to shudder and we both came together in a blinding, agonising ecstasy.

I turned toward him, holding his face with my hands, kissing him intensely as my body started to come down from the height of orgasm.

"Woah, tiger!" he cautioned as I got carried away, gripping him too tightly.

"It's your fault, you are much too good at this"

"No, it's your fault, you bring out the best in me, my inspirational nymph!"

"Nymph?" I laughed.

"Yes, you are my own personal little nymphet and I command you to stay with me forever!" I smiled at the order, then holding his gaze, I bared my soul, if a soul I had;

"Edward" I said solemnly, "I will stay with you until the end of time."


	7. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Edward laughed out loud when he saw the bedside table smashed in a heap on the floor.

" I can see you are going to cost me a fortune if this happens every day!"

"Oh yeah, big boy, every day, eh?" He grabbed me, embracing me in a bear hug, smirking "Yeah, too damn right every day, think you can keep up?"

"I shall do my very best" I said with a straight face, trying in vain not to laugh.

He snickered, "Imagine the insurance claim report ; "Bedroom furniture broken beyond repair by over-enthusiastic orgasm during love-making!"

"Yes, and I would bet all the money I possessed that it would be a female insurance investigator that would turn up to check you out!"

"Mm" he pondered, "Now there's a thought." I smacked him lightly in the chest "Hey You! Keep it zipped or I might just bite it off!" I bared my teeth at him menacingly but he just hugged me even tighter; "You don't scare me Bella!"

He nuzzled my neck, murmuring, "But if I lost you...now that would be really scary."

"Oh god, Edward," as I melted into his arms, "you don't play fair!"

I left him then, to get on with some work. I smiled as he walked backward pointing at me "I have quite a few chapters to correct now, missy!"

I tried working at some figures when I returned home but my eyes kept straying to the clock, longing to see him again.

I chuckled to myself, "You are like an addict Bella and he is your own personal brand of heroin."

There was no way I was seeking a cure to this addiction though.

Seven o clock came around eventually, and I heard his car stop outside then a light tap at the door.

I had primed Rose to be on her best behaviour and she had responded in her usual Rose-like way.

"What the fuck do you think I'm going to do, eat him?"

"No, but can you just keep the swearing to a minimum? Besides," I added suggestively, "That's my job!"

She had put her hands over her ears and laughingly said "Too much information!"

I opened the door, and there he stood. A slight breeze had ruffled his hair, and the tight silver grey v necked sweater he wore over slim fitting black trousers, outlined every part of his muscular body. His face...I don't think I would ever tire of looking at his beautiful face.

If he ever got fed up with writing, then a career as a model would be no problem...or an actor...I could just imagine the screaming hordes of women that would long for a piece of him...

I must have been staring a while, unable to look away, because a knowing gleam came into his eye as he asked " Are you going to let me in, Bella?"

I came to with a shake of my head and ushered him into the living room where Rose and Jacob were waiting.

He immediately went over to Rose to introduce himself.

I could see him shiver slightly as he held her hand but he never said anything.

Rose meanwhile, looked him up and down and said "Well you're as fucking hot looking as I remembered!"

"Rose!" I cried indignantly. Edward blushed to the roots of his hair and my insides melted once again.

"Well he is." she exclaimed and this time Edward laughed out loud.

"Rose" he said, I think you and me are going to get along just fucking fine!"

Jacob coughed and Edward turned to him, holding out his hand again.

He winced as Jacob returned his hand shake.

"Jacob!" I warned and he smiled at Edward and said "Sorry, I don't know my own strength."

The smile however didn't quite meet his eyes.

I marvelled at Edward as he faced down Jacob, standing eye to eye with him. Jacob could have killed him with one strike but my brave man didn't waver.

Stepping in between them I asked lightly "Edward, can I get you something to drink, a glass of wine perhaps?"

Jacob broke eye contact first and walked away to sit on the sofa, crossing one leg elegantly over the other.

Inside, I seethed. Boy, was he going to feel my wrath later.

Edward turned to me and gently put an arm around my shoulders; "I would love one, hon," he softly replied.

I hid my smile as I went to get him his drink. "What is it with men and there macho posturing?" I thought, "now I had Edward getting all territorial!"

Rose came to the rescue as usual, breaking the ice as she asked Edward about his books, how he felt seeing them played out on screen and what his next project would be.

I could see he enjoyed her company, answering her questions and asking her a few of his own regarding her painting and sculptures.

"Actually, I have a showing coming up at a local gallery next month. I would love you to come and see my work."

"I'd be delighted!" Turning to me he said "Perhaps we could all make a night of it, there's a jazz night club I know. We could relax there after, what do you think?"

"Cant fucking wait" Jacob muttered, but we all ignored him. "Petulant bastard" I thought.

Rose clapped her hands together, "A jazz club! How sexy is that? Count me in!

"Can't think of a better excuse to buy a new dress; show off at my show then a chance to fucking slow smooch to some sultry blues!"

We all laughed at the picture she painted. God, I loved this girl.

We made our goodbyes, as I was going back with Edward. I couldn't spend a night now without him. Rose reached up to give him a hug, and I hugged her too, whispering a quiet thank you.

He seemed subdued as we undressed for bed.

I gave him a moment to say what was bothering him but when nothing was forthcoming I asked what the matter was.

"Rose." he said. "Rose?" I echoed. "I thought you had got on so well?"

"Oh we did, trust me we did! She is something else, isn't she?" he said fondly.

"So what's the matter?" I repeated.

"Well...when I took her hand...she was icy cold?"

"Ah," I said, understanding now.

"Why don't you feel like that to me?"

"I don't know Edward, I really don't know why. To all other humans I am, but to you? No."

Edward had a pained look on his face as he asked me "Is there something wrong with me, do you think?"

I spluttered, "I am the vampire here remember, if anything is wrong with anybody it will be with me!"

"Then I don't understand, Bella, to me you feel perfect, too perfect sometimes."

"Maybe it's something we just have to accept and not question" I answered, walking into his welcoming arms.

We just held each other in bed, both contented enough not to take it any further.

"I love you Bella" he murmured softly, brushing my hair out of my eyes.

"I love you too" I said, kissing him softly, his lips pliant under mine.

He fell asleep holding me, and even though he was the human, I felt safe there.

A thought came to me as I lay watching him sleep, and I got up and put on one of Edwards sweaters and padded down to his study.

Logging onto Google on his computer, I typed in "Soul Mates and Myths"

I found a site and clicked on, reading with interest at what it had to say;

"When one thinks of a soul mate they usually think of a person with whom they have a deep and spiritual love for. There is usually a natural physical, mental or emotional connection between them.

It was often believed that each individual only had one soul mate who they were destined to meet one day; the other half of themselves that when once united, would make a whole and would thus be complete. This one true love is called a twin flame soul mate.

Souls often reunite again to work out past life issues, sometimes playing reverse roles in similar situations. We subconsciously attract our soul mate and this is why we are drawn to certain individuals for no apparent reason, or the more obvious "instant attraction" that occurs between strangers. We have agreed pre-birth to meet so we can be with one another again.

TWIN FLAME SOUL MATE.

There is usually one twin flame soul mate for each of us. Twin flame soul mates have spent multiple lifetimes together in past lives. There is an incredible chemistry and attraction toward each other. They complete each other and only a few lucky people are able to find their twin flame soul mate.

Both have an interest in a particular culture and an intuitive feeling that their relationship was predestined. The recognition of the soul is most often found in the eyes as they seem to draw you in.

This instant attraction and chemistry is often then known as " love at first sight."

I sat back, astounded. Is this what Edward and I were? Twin souls that had found each other again?

A couple of the sentences had made me sit up with amazement. The "playing reverse roles in similar situations." Did this mean in a previous life Edward had been a vampire and that was why my skin felt okay to him? But this didn't explain why Rose felt icy to him.

Maybe it had to do with the other comment I noticed ; "Twin soul mates have spent multiple lifetimes together in past lives"

Perhaps we had spent so much time in each others company that we had become inured to each others faults and the feel of my skin had become second nature to him now.

It also explained the chemistry we had for each other and why the attraction had been instant.

I laughed with utter delight; Edward was my soul mate, my twin flame soul mate!

We had been lost and had found each other again!

I jumped to me feet and clapped my hands in glee, knocking over the small table lamp over the other side of his desk.

I leaned over, my fingers searching for the shade to put it back in place.

In hindsight, I couldn't really blame Edward for what happened next as the sight that must have been presented to him when he came downstairs to see what the noise was, must have been too much too handle!

I had been leaning over the desk with my two ass cheeks peeking out from under his sweater, straining to find the lamp.

I felt him behind me as he raised the sweater up exposing my bare bottom.

"Jesus Christ, Bella, This is too fucking irresistible!" as he pushed my legs apart with one foot.

"Or should I say, I can't fucking resist fucking you?" as he bent me over the desk and entered me with one powerful thrust. The erotic feeling of not being able to move as I was imprisoned by the desk and Edward pumping into me from behind, was explosive.

I opened my legs as wide as they would go, lifting myself at the same time. I could feel the full length of him inside me as each thrust went deeper and deeper.

This was fucking, fucking like two animals rutting, and it was the biggest turn on I had ever felt.

As we were getting near the ultimate finish, I cried out " Fuck me...fuck me...fuck me...Edward!.

He exploded into me with convulsing shudders as my insides gripped him in tight orgasmic waves.

He pulled out from me and helped me up from the desk.

"Do I need to apologise?" he asked. "It's just seeing you like that..."

"Edward...that was fucking spectacular!" I said, laughing at the intended pun.

I kissed him, my tongue searching for his as I still felt high from the buzz.

He picked me up in his arms and carried me upstairs.

He laid me on the bed and as he climbed in next to me, he said "See? I told you it should be every day!"

With a smirk he added " I cannot be held responsible for my actions if I don't get to fuck you senseless at least once a day!"

"Fuck me senseless, indeed?" I retorted.

" Worship and love your sensational body with the adoration it deserves. Is that better?"

"Yes it is" I said primly, then added "But fucking me senseless sounds much more fun!"

I stayed in bed this time, watching him sleep. That perfect face relaxed and looking adorable as his mouth slightly parted ; a snore escaping.

He was my twin flame man and I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.


	8. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

The following Saturday, Rose and I agreed to go and see Edward play in his band Obsidian.

We hadn't mentioned it to Jacob as I still wasn't speaking to him after his appalling behaviour the other night.

I didn't know what had gotten into him; he was usually the perfect gentleman.

The music was blaring as usual when we entered the club, the swaying bodies filling the dance floor.

We ordered our drinks, tapping our feet to the music and waited for the band to come on.

After about ten minutes, out came Edward, with the rest of the band following behind. Picking their instruments up to tune them, I could see Edward craning his neck trying to find me in the crush of bodies.

I waved frantically and his eyes zoned in on me. A huge grin lit up his face and I felt myself grinning right back. " God, I could eat him with a spoon" I thought, "he only has to smile and the world stops spinning."

They played their usual set with a few extra ones I hadn't heard, then the lights went down and there was Edward, centre stage again, and that first night came flooding back.

"I would like to dedicate this next song to Bella. The lyrics are especially important to me."

"Its a song by Robert Palmer called She Makes My Day."

He hadn't told me he was going to do this, but as he started singing to me, I fell in love with him all over again.

I feel so lucky loving her

Tell me what else is magic for?

She thinks it's better left unsaid

She makes her mind up at a glance

It really made a difference

I seem to be unconditionally hers.

She's like a new girl every day

And all the rest don't bother me

I'm far too busy loving her

I'll never be lonely now I know her

She trusts her intuition

'Cause she fills my heart with joy.

She acts in my defence

She just has to smile to blow my cares away

She makes my day

She just has to touch my hand to make me stay

She's all good loving at once

She's all good loving at once

She's all good loving at once

she's all good loving at once

Our love was unintentional

She says we're not responsible

She thinks with her chin up.

She always makes uncommon sense

Always knows just what to say

She always takes me unawares

In less time than it takes to fall

I'm here and there you are

We never fought it anyway.

She's all good loving at once

She's all good loving at once

She's all good loving at once

As the crowd clapped and roared , I was up on the stage in a second, my arms around Edwards neck, kissing him like mad. The crowd roared even louder.

I jumped back down to let them finish playing, running back over to where Rose was standing with a beaming smile on her face.

" You have got a keeper there, Bella, a fucking keeper, so don't mess this up, okay?"

I just smiled and said "You are preaching to the converted, Rose"

As we waited for the band to wrap up, I felt Rose nudge my elbow.

"I've just spotted Jacob chatting up some girl, hopefully he will stay away from us tonight."

I fervently hoped so, as Edward wanted to introduce me to his brother and his friends and I didn't want Jacob butting his nose in.

Rose and I went back stage and with Edwards arm around me he said "Emmett, I'd like to introduce you to Bella and her friend Rose, Bella this is my big brother Emmett.

I went to offer my hand but instead found myself in a bear like hug that would have crushed the air out of a human. He swung me round and said "Great to meet you at last Bella, because you are all we have heard about these last few weeks!"

"Shut up Emmett and put her down before you crush her to death" Edward said as he punched Emmett on the arm.

Emmett turned to Rose with the same gleam in his eye, only to hear Rose say "Stay where you are, handsome, you're not twirling me around!"

Emmett laughed, and just held out his hand, took Rose's hand and kissed the back of it.

"Now that's more like it" she said.

Edward turned to Jasper and Alice and introduced me and Alice gave me a hug too. " Welcome Bella, I hope we can get to know each better."

"I hope so too" I replied.

Whether I could have a human girl as a friend was something I would have to think about, as there were so many pitfalls to tumble into.

She was lovely to look at, petite in stature, with her short dark hair cut into an elfin spiky cut and dark eyes that sparkled with fun.

Jasper kissed me on the cheek and whispered "thank you" in my ear.

I nodded, understanding on my face.

We both shared the secret of that phone message he had left and I felt a natural affinity toward him.

His eyes showed kindness and his calm demeanour was soothing.

We all decided to go to a late night bar where they always went to wind down after playing, and we agreed to meet them outside after they had finished stowing their gear in the back of their van.

As Rose and I waited, I felt a sudden shift and Jacob was at my side. "So this is where you've got to" he said. "I saw you earlier and then you vanished."

"We went backstage" I said, "Edward wanted to introduce me to his friends"

"Edward" he sneered. "I'm fucking sick of hearing that guys name."

"Jacob!" I cried, "What on earth's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with me?" he questioned. "Don't you mean what's the matter with you?"

"He is a human Bella, what the fuck are you mooning over a human for?"

" I mean, if you want to get laid that bad, there are plenty of vampires that will oblige; I thought that's what you came to me for?" he sneered again.

I gasped, Is that what this was about? The green eyed monster? Jacob was jealous?

I knew ex-lovers could sometimes be difficult when you move on, but a jealous ex vampire lover could have disastrous consequences.

Edward came over when he saw I was upset, followed closely by Emmett and Jasper.

"What's going on?" he said to Jacob as Emmett crowded in as well.

"Is this guy bothering you Bella? Emmett asked, "would you like us to help him on his way?"

Jacob didn't even bother to acknowledge Emmett, much to Emmett's annoyance.

He just turned his head slowly toward Edward and said in a sinister undertone "I think we both know that's not going to happen, don't you?"

" Back off Emmett, I got this." Edward said, as he laid a restraining arm on his brother.

"What the...?" demanded Emmett as he knew Edward was behaving oddly.

Rose pushed past both and faced Jacob.

In a low emphatic voice, with just a hint of menace, Rose said "Get the fuck out of here Jacob, you are spoiling my goddamn night."

Jacob stared at her before saying "Just for you Rose, just for you."

His eyes glittered at me as he warned "This isn't over Bella."

He turned with a flourish, saluted with a hand to his head and said sarcastically "It's been a pleasure, gentlemen," and strode off into the night.

"What the fuck was his problem?" Emmett asked, still coiled up like a spring.

"Leave it Emmett, it's nothing to worry about."

Edward put his arms around me. "Are you okay?"

"Yes I'm fine,... look, do you mind if we forego that drink tonight? I looked over to where Alice was standing with a worried look on her face. "Of course not" she said. "We can get together another time. I'll call you, okay?"

I gave her a hug for being so understanding and watched them drive off. I could still hear Emmett grumbling about Jacob..."Man, I wanted to wipe that smirk off his face..."

I lay in Edwards arms that night, going over the evenings events.

It had been such a lovely night; Edwards song to me, meeting his brother and Alice and Jasper.

It would have been great to have shared a drink with them, got to know them better.

Jacob...A feeling of dread coursed through my body. My sixth sense was kicking in, and I fretted at what this meant. It reminded me of that 1962 novel by Ray Bradbury.."Something Wicked This Way Comes."

I couldn't foretell the future, I just knew the jealousy that Jacob felt was something to be be feared.

It was a situation that could escalate, and I knew nothing good would come of it.

I had always known Jacob had a petty, spiteful streak, but this had never bothered me before. Being nomadic, he wandered in and out of my life as the whim took him, never staying long enough to irritate me.

Now, he could so easily destroy my world in an instant. I curled up against Edward, feeling his warmth, but even his closeness could not ward of my unease.

The evening of Rose's show came around and worrying thoughts of Jacob left as I excitedly got dressed. I had wanted a "dressed to kill" look and then laughed out loud when I realised what I had thought.

We had been shopping the previous week, Rose squealing when she had found her dream dress.

It was a long and red and slit to the thigh, suiting her complexion beautifully.. It was also damn sexy, hence the squeal!

It took a while to find mine. I was looking for something different and if truth be told, something that would make Edwards eyes pop!

After many selections being discarded and Rose starting to roll her eyes with impatience, I found it.

It was in a small select shop that we almost missed, and as I came out of the changing room Rose let out a low whistle. Even the shop assistant said "Oh my" and took a step back.

It was gold, with a shimmer running through it, that made it change colour as I moved.

The shoulders were cut away and it draped into a low cowl neck at the front, Grecian style, skimming each side with the curve of my breast peeking out, then it clung to my body like a second skin, draping down to the floor.

It was the back that was sensational. It was totally bare, and dipped down to just above my ass with a draped swell at the bottom.

We giggled like two teenagers on our way back, excited about getting "glammed" up.

Tonight, I had piled my long hair on top, with a pretty jewelled comb to keep it in place.

I wanted Edward to see the back without any obstruction my long hair would cause!

Diamond stud earrings that sparkled in the light, completed the look.

I heard the throaty roar of a car pull up outside, and puzzled, I looked out of my bedroom window to see who it was.

A gleaming silver grey Porsche Carrera GT was parked outside, its engine running with a deep purr.

Leaning against it was Edward, arms folded, legs crossed, staring up at me.

I had to lean against the window sill for support as I took in the sight of him.

He was dressed in a black tuxedo, crisp white shirt and black bow tie. He had combed his hair back but one errant lock had fallen onto his forehead as though in rebellion.

"If ever a tux was made for a man" I thought, and the raw sex appeal? Edward had it in spades.

Of course the sardonic grin on his face didn't help as he saw me looking down at him.

"Wait till you get a load of my dress, mister" I thought, "Who will be grinning then?"

I hurried down to open the door. We were meeting Rose at the gallery, as she had to be there early to meet and greet.

I've got to admit, his expression was everything I could have hoped for, when he first saw me.

His mouth dropped open and then he gulped and he just about managed to say one word..."Perfect"

I will also admit, seeing him close up in his dinner jacket looking more handsome than ever, also took my breath away.

I turned to get my bag, and heard a gasp as Edward came up behind me.

"Fucking hell, that dress is going to kill me before the night is over" he said breathlessly, kissing down my neck and making my legs turn to jelly.

"Stop it Edward, we're going to be late" but my actions belied my words as I pushed myself up against him.

"I love your hair like this, your neck is so elegant and my mouth can just do this...and this..." he panted, as he brushed his lips past my ear lobe and back with soft nips and kisses.

"Oh god, please stop, otherwise this dress will have been for nothing as we're not going to get out of the house!"

"Can we continue this later?" I pleaded.

He snickered into my neck ,"Hold that thought, Bella."

He helped me into the low slung car, folding my dress neatly around me and then got in the other side.

"New car?" I enquired.

"Nah, this old thing?" he smirked again. I stared at the smug look on his face and thought "I'll teach him."

I leaned back in the seat.

"This a gorgeous dress, isn't it, but it was so close fitting, I had to remove all my underwear."

"You're not wearing anything?" he sputtered.

"Nope, totally naked under this dress."

The car swerved slightly as Edward's hands shook on the steering wheel.

My hand shot out like a blur and put the car back on course.

"Steady, baby, You want to get there in one piece don't you? I asked sweetly.

Tonight was going to be so good.

The lights were blazing in the gallery and there were already quite a few people milling around, admiring the works of art.

We were each handed a glass of champagne as we arrived , and we went in search of Rose.

We found her chatting to an elderly distinguished gentleman, discussing one of her sculptures, but as soon as he had moved on to the next exhibit, she hurried over to us.

"I'd better warn you, Jacob is here"

"Oh no, I wailed. "I was so hoping for a quiet evening."

"I'm sorry, it's my fault, I invited him when he asked if he could come. He is an old friend, and I felt it would be churlish to refuse, especially when I found he was bringing a lady friend."

"It's not your fault Rose, It's your exhibition and you are allowed to invite who you like. Besides I'm not going to let him spoil my evening."

"Too right he's not" Edward agreed. " I don't care what he is, surely vampires have to manners?"

"Mm, that depends, Edward,... sometimes they just rip your throat right out without a please or a fucking thank you!" Rose whispered, with a deadpan expression.

At first Edward looked shocked, then laughed out loud, causing heads to turn in our direction.

"Rose, you crack me up!"

"Poor boy thinks I'm joking" she whispered to me as she passed, and then said out loud "I have to mingle again, be good while I'm gone."

We strolled around the gallery, marvelling at the amazing sculptures, stopping to touch them, they were so tactile.

Behind me, I heard a voice that made my stomach plummet.

"Good evening Bella, I was hoping we would run into each other."

Jacob was standing there, looking dashing in his dinner suit, arm in arm with a tall woman.

"Allow me to introduce you to a good friend of mine; "Bella, this is Tanya,...Tanya Denali.

She had long red hair and glittering blue eyes. She was very statuesque and even taller than me, with large breasts and long legs. She was very intimidating in a feral sort of way.

I smiled at her and she gave me her interpretation of a smile before quickly moving her eyes toward Edward.

"And who might this be?" she asked as Jacobs mouth pressed together in a thin line.

Jacob begrudgingly made the introduction, "Tanya, this is Edward, Bella's friend.

She held her hand out and Edward took it, a shudder running through him. He dropped it as quickly as etiquette allowed and put his arm round mine.

Tanya made little pretence of her interest as her eyes raked up and down Edward's body., mentally undressing him with her eyes. Her interest in him sexually was undeniable.

She looked like she wanted to eat him...after...

We quickly made our excuses and moved away, glad to be out of their company.

"Who the hell was that?" Edward asked, running his hand through his hair.

"I can vaguely remember her from a while back, I think her and Jacob had a thing going at one time, but I haven't heard about her for years."

"I wonder why he brought her tonight" I pondered. Jacob never did anything without a reason.

"Forget about them and lets enjoy the rest of the evening" Edward said, as he linked arms with me again.

We continued on into the night at the jazz club. Having Edward hold me, his hands splayed on my bare back, to the sound of some low sultry blues was a form of foreplay to me and I couldn't wait to get him back home.

Rose was enjoying herself too with some friends she had invited from the gallery, so we made our excuses and hurried out into the night.

Standing alone at last in his bedroom, Edward undone the tie at my neck and my beautiful dress fell and pooled at my feet in one liquid motion.

He stepped back and I went to reach for him but he shook his head.

He just stared at me, standing naked, and I felt shy at his concentrated gaze.

"You are so beautiful Bella" he said simply, the timbre of his voice deepening.

I didn't reply, I was too overwhelmed.

Removing his jacket, then shirt and trousers, I slowly undressed him. Something I hadn't done in a leisurely fashion before but I found it shockingly erotic.

We lay on the bed, his body covering mine, his mouth moving slowly over every inch of my body.

Everything seemed to be in slow motion, as my arms went up and around his back, feeling the muscles bunch in my hands.

He kissed me, his open mouth covering mine, his tongue dancing with mine, making me groan out loud.

I felt his hand between my legs, his fingers touching and probing and I arched my back in response.

I wanted him there and then, and he must have sensed this as I felt his penis slowly glide into me, my body reacting to the penetration.

Slowly, oh so slowly, he moved in and out, and I met him on the rise each time.

We never hurried, only our breath gained speed, as each slow thrust brought me ever nearer.

In between he would stop to kiss my mouth or my breasts, sucking each nipple, prolonging the moment, delaying the inevitable.

On and on we made love. The stop and start technique making it seem as if it would last forever.

I put my legs over his back and he lifted me up, holding my buttocks in his hands as his total length fitted inside me.

The sensation was exquisite, as my clitoris rubbed against his body I felt myself explode. My hands gripped the pillow above my head and I ripped it in two, my jaw clenched together as I felt the orgasm tear through me.

Edward picked up my legs and put them over his shoulders bracing and bending me under him. I felt another wave hit as Edward shuddered into me, coming again and again, his head back, crying out in ecstasy.

We lay next to each other, totally spent, the sweat glistening on Edwards body. He kissed me again, and stared into my eyes.

"Y'know, I find those blue eyes a complete turn on."

He always knew the right thing to say.


	9. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

As the days turned into weeks, the threat of Jacob faded away. Rose informed me he had moved on, and so I finally began to relax.

I got on with some work; I also freelanced as a financial advisor, my sixth sense nose helping my clients to make money.

Edward knuckled down to finishing his latest book, and I was a very good girl and left him in peace.

Daytime, he could work, night time he was mine!

I popped my head in to check on him each day, making sure he was eating okay. When he was in the middle of a gripping chapter, all thoughts of food were forgotten.

This one day, I saw him beavering away at his laptop and noticed his face was getting covered in thick hair where he hadn't taken the time to shave.

I backed out of the room as an idea took shape in my mind.

I sped back to my house and flew up the stairs to my bedroom, startling Rose on the way.

"Don't mind me" I shouted, "I've just come back for something!"

She just rolled her eyes muttering "Crazy woman."

In a large sea chest in my bedroom, I kept mementos from my past. Items I treasured that held a special memory. Amongst these was a small black box, which I picked up and took with me back to Edwards house.

I could still hear him typing away, so I went to the bathroom and selected a small white towel, which I doused in water and then put in the microwave so it was piping hot.

Wearing just one of Edwards white shirts, I strolled into his study armed with my little black box, the towel over one shoulder and a small bowl of warm water.

He stopped typing and looked at me, puzzlement written all over his face.

I put my items on his desk, carefully moving his laptop out of the way.

"Hey! I need that!" he cried, indignantly.

I leaned forward and placed one finger on his mouth saying "Shush!"

"For the next half an hour I don't want you to move or speak, okay?"

He nodded, but I could see a worried frown appear between his eyes.

I went behind him and gently pulled his head back so that it was resting against the back of the chair wrapping the hot towel around his face.

"Ow!,what the hell?" "No talking I said!"

I let the towel do the work as I opened my black box and took out the shaving brush and cut throat razor. I sharpened it on the strop that came with it, as I couldn't face any nicks on Edwards face.

Removing the towel, I straddled Edward, wriggling until a certain mound was correctly positioned underneath me.

"Edward, I want you to close your eyes and keep them closed, understand?" He nodded again.

"Let me repeat, you are not to speak or move in any way, as the result of disobeying me could be fatal."

I could see his breathing get a little faster and a certain something twitched underneath me.

I smiled...this was going to be fun!

I lathered up the brush and slowly covered his face with the foamy soap.

I also used my hands to work the soap around his mouth and down his neck.

His breathing was getting faster now, but as I put the cold steel of the razor against his cheek, he held his breath.

With a deft hand I scraped the hair from his face, leaning ever closer with each stroke, my breath tickling his face and neck.

I lifted his chin up to get at the hairs on his neck, whispering "My, what a lovely neck you have, my dear." A la Little Red Riding Hood, only I was the big bad wolf!

"Imagine, just one slip...and...I... would have to suck your blood away" I whispered into his ear,a growl escaping from my lips. Edward had never heard me growl, and the result was instant as I felt a prod from underneath.

I couldn't stop myself from moving my hips, grinding my body as I shaved him.

He started to groan, and I put my finger against his mouth again saying "Shush now" but he grabbed it into his mouth and started sucking it.

Watching him do this with his eyes closed, drove me wild, and with a quick flick of the towel, I wiped his clean shaved face, undid his flies and lowered myself onto him.

Holding onto his shoulders, I raised myself up and down, each penetration deeper than the last. I started a rocking movement, rubbing my clitoris against him with each measured movement.

He grabbed my ass and pumped me up and down faster, his orgasm not far away.

I came in a crashing crescendo and he cried out at the same time, as his seed spurting into me.

Clasping his face in my hands I kissed him. "You can open your eyes now."

He smiled a euphoric smile, rubbed his hand over his face and said "You missed a bit."

"I told you not to move, Edward." I replied cheekily.

A few days later Edward finally finished his book, and that night he came to bed exhausted, and fell asleep instantly.

I got up and left as I knew nothing would wake him till morning and I knew Rose needed me to help her with one of her sculptures.

I also needed to feed, so I headed to the woods to bring down a deer or two.

Rose was making a large abstract sculpture and needed help pouring the clay into moulds.

We worked together through the night and as the red light of dawn was streaking across the sky, I made my way back up to Edwards bedroom again.

As soon as I crept over the window sill the scent assailed my nostrils and I knew a vampire had been here.

Edward was still asleep so I took the opportunity to inspect the rest of the house.

The scent was everywhere, his living room, it lingered in his study but it was strongest in his bedroom.

A vampire had been here during the night and watched him sleep!

An all consuming fear ran through me. This man that I loved, this _human_ man was in mortal danger, and I didn't know what to do.

I sat in a chair in the corner of the room hugging my knees to my chest.

I sat like that until the sun filtered through the window and Edward awoke.

He automatically felt for me, and not finding me in my usual place beside him, he looked up and saw me sitting in the chair.

"What are you doing all the way over there?"

I put my head in my hands and started to cry dry tears.

"Bella, what ever's the matter?" He quickly rose and hurried over to take me in his arms.

"Hush now" he soothed as he carried me to the bed.

"Tell me what's wrong; you were fine last night."

Between deep breaths and sobs I told him what I had discovered.

"Have you any idea who it can be?" he asked.

"No, I don't know, It can't be Jacob, Rose told me he had gone."

At the mention of Jacob, Edward rubbed the back of his neck and asked "What about that she-devil he had with him. She seemed pretty interested?"

Tanya!...Could it be her coming back for a second look?

If Jacob had wanted to kill Edward, he could have done it at any time; why would he watch him sleep?

All these thoughts flashed across my face and Edward said "You think it's Tanya don't you?"

I nodded. "It would seem to be the action a female would make, and she was licking her lips when she saw you!"

"So what do we do now? he asked.

I got up from the bed and started pacing the floor.

"I will have to stay with you at all times."

"But that's crazy! What about when you need to eat?" he remonstrated.

(He never called it "feed", said it sounded too animalistic)

"Rose can come and stay with you then, we can take it in turns."

Edward started pacing then, gesticulating madly. "There is no way in hell I am having two women guarding me!"

"But Edward, you're in danger, can't you see that?"

"Maybe you're right, but I can't live my life like that. Surely she will just get bored and go away?"

"Oh Edward, does that happen in your books? No! And it wont happen here."

"She is just starting to enjoy herself. She knows I would have smelled her scent and how it would affect me.

She likes watching you because she enjoys the feeling of power she has over you.

She knows she can kill you when she feels like it but if she can get you to agree to have sex with her, that would make her fucking day!"

"That is never going to happen while I have breath in my body."

"Then she will just kill you; vampires who feed on humans, find drinking their blood just as exciting as sex, so she is in a win win situation."

I tried to make Edward see sense but he was adamant he didn't want Rose to come over and for everything to remain as it was.

He didn't realise nothing would be the same again.

Life went on as usual, but I was a nervous wreck. I never left Edward's side and was insistent when he tried to reason with me.

As the days and weeks passed, I started to relax a little but my sixth sense remained on alert.

I did tell Rose about what had happened and she agreed to watch over Edward without him knowing, whenever I had to leave him.

I would rather face his wrath than lose him forever. There was no contest.

Weeks later I had to collect a jacket I had left in my bedroom, so Rose hovered outside Edward's house while I was gone.

I retrieved the jacket from my wardrobe and felt the air stir behind me.

"Oh god, was this Tanya? Had she come back?

I turned slowly around and there standing at the window was the man that had turned me all those years ago.

I gasped out loud.

"Hello again Isabella." He picked up a necklace from my dressing table and played with it in his hands.

"You are looking absolutely delightful but then I knew the immortal life would suit you."

"What do you want?" I asked, a tremor in my voice.

"Why nothing for you to worry your pretty little head about."

"I just like to seek out my little "conquests" shall we say, from time to time and I haven't checked on you for a while."

"Checked on me? I haven't seen you since that day"

"Ah my dear sweet Isabella, I have seen you." He came closer and my back bumped into the wardrobe.

He had a soft sinister way of talking, as if he were a close friend that would kill you on a whim.

The back of his hand brushed against my cheek, sending shivers down my spine.

"I do dislike the way of life you have chosen for yourself, I expected better things from you Isabella."

His mouth formed a sneer, "Its totally abhorrent to me that you would choose to feed on animals when there are perfectly good humans out there. Why you would need to put their foul blood in your mouth is beyond me."

"However, I digress, a little bird has given me some information that needed investigating, so I came to see for myself."

He took hold of my hand in his pale withered one and held it tightly. With his eyes closed he looked even more sinister, as I took in the white marble veined face and black slicked- back hair.

Eventually he spoke. "So Isabella, who is this Edward whose love you crave, or is it his blood?"

I went even colder when I heard him mention Edward's name.

"How did you...?

"How did I know? Mind reading is one of my many talents. I only have to touch you to know all your thoughts and it would appear this Edward is a constant in your life."

"You don't even know who I am, do you?" he asked, his head tilted to one side.

I shook my head, too afraid to speak.

"Have you heard of the Volturi, little one?"

I stared at him in amazement. All vampires had been told the stories of the Volturi.

They were a group of vampires residing in Italy. They were educated, refined, many centuries old and in possession of many different abilities.

They were also deadly and more importantly, made the laws for all vampires.

Their one rule that had to be obeyed was to keep the existence of vampires a secret.

As recognition dawned on my face, he said "So it would appear you have heard of us."

"Allow me to introduce myself to you formally;

"My name is Aro and I am the head of the Volturi" then he smiled that sinister smile that made my skin crawl.

"You see, don't you now feel honoured it was I who made you what you are?" I didn't answer, I couldn't.

"I can see I have swept you away" he laughed. "You are tongue-tied in awe" he laughed again.

"Now you can see why I am perturbed by this "Edward." He reached forward and caressed a lock of my hair between his fingers.

"He cannot know of our existence, so you now have two choices to make, my dear."

My body turned to stone as his next words devastated me.

"You either kill him or you change him into one of us." "Do you understand?" he said harshly.

"Yes, I answered, still too scared to move.

"There, you see? We managed to sort out that little problem quite amicably."

With one last caress of my cheek he was gone.

How long I stood there I dont know, I was completely numb.

Tanya now was the least of my problems.

The _Volturi_ were involved!

Dear god, i didn't know what to do.


	10. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

I never told Edward about Aro's visit, or about the Volturi. I just knew it would freak him out, or even worse make him do something stupid.

He had never ever mentioned about becoming like me, and to make him become a vampire for my own selfish reasons wasn't something I could even contemplate.

Yes, there were certain advantages of being immortal, but the advantages that came with being human outweighed them tenfold.

A warm touch, the simple pleasures of eating and drinking, to be able to sleep, and more importantly not to crave blood...human blood. To buy my food from a supermarket instead of bringing down a living creature, was something I could only dream about.

There was also one more human event I would have loved more than anything else...a baby.

To have Edward's baby, to hold in my arms a part of him that had been made from love, was a joy I would never experience.

Of course, the alternative to this was death and killing Edward never even entered the equation.

The weeks went by and I became more worried and irritable with each passing day.

I followed Edward around like a mother hen, checking windows, locking doors, asking where he would be every minute.

I was so concerned about losing him that I lost sight of the bigger picture, until one day Edward

made me realise how this was affecting him.

After checking his itinerary for the second time that day, Edward said "Will you stop worrying Bella, you are driving me mad!" He said it with a smile to soften the words but I could tell he was getting irritated.

Unfortunately, my mind was so set on protecting him, I didn't realise my actions were insensitive and so I remonstrated with him again.

"Edward you may write about them but you don't have any concept of their capabilities!"

" I can only protect you to a certain degree, you have to try to understand this."

" I can take care of myself Bella!"he insisted.

"Can you? Because sometimes I think you forget you are human!" I shouted, unable to keep my temper in check when I was so worried about him.

He went totally still and said quietly, "Bella, I never ever forget I am human, compared to you."

His voice had a steely ring to it as he added, "I know you are the indestructible vampire, and I am weak in comparison, but all this fussing around me is driving me crazy!"

"Why don't you just cut my balls off and be done with it?" he said, starting to raise his voice.

"Now you're just being stupid!" I shouted back.

"Now I'm stupid? he yelled, "Well I may be stupid and I may be only human, but I am essentially a man and a proud man at that, so why don't you fucking treat me like one!"

He stormed past me, heading for the door, but in a blur, I was in front of him barring his way. "Don't you dare walk out on me!"

"Ooh look, who can move really fast; showing off now are we Bella?" he said sarcastically.

"Now you're being childish," I retorted.

"Childish? I thought that's how you wanted me?" All afraid of scary things so Bella can save me?"

His face was so close to mine that his breath fanned my face.

"You ungrateful bastard! Well you're on your own now, buster! Screw you!" I yelled in his face.

"NO, Screw you!" he yelled back.

For an infinitesimal second we locked eyes, face to face, both panting with rage.

He suddenly grabbed my head by the hair and roughly started kissing me, all the pent up emotion pouring out.

I pulled at his hair, wanting to hurt him too and I pushed him over the arm of a chair and we rolled onto the floor.

I was growling by now, my eyes an icy blue, pupils dilated in fury, as I tore his shirt to shreds.

He started ripping my clothes apart, groaning over and over.. ..."I fucking hate you Bella,...I fucking hate you so much...

He flipped me over onto my back and thrust into me with one hard stroke after another.

He pinioned me to the floor and held both my arms above me so I couldn't move.

He stopped pushing and said "You want me to fuck you Bella, you want me to show you how much of a man I am?"

He started moving again, asking with each thrust, " You want me, Bella? Say it, I want to hear you say it."

I let him hold me down. This was all about him being in control and I realised what I had been doing to him...I had slowly been emasculating him, chipping away at his masculinity.

I looked up at his angry face and all I wanted was my Edward back, my loving, affectionate man.

"I want you to love me Edward, that's all I've ever wanted" I said, choking out the words.

His anger vanished in an instant. He immediately stopped and slumped over me, "I'm sorry Bella, I'm so, so sorry" he groaned, gathering me up in his arms.

I sat astride his lap, his legs underneath me, as he held me in his arms.

"No, I'm sorry Edward, so sorry for hurting you. I love you so much, I just never want to lose you."

"Don't you know how much I love you too? he answered " and you will never lose me, I promise you that. Where else am I gonna go?"

He kissed down my neck, nuzzling me, as with a gentle rocking motion, I met each push of his with another of my own. I didn't know where he started and I finished. I clutched him to me, with my hands around his neck and my legs wrapped around his middle. I couldn't get any closer to him if I tried as he filled me up in ways I had never experienced. My breasts rubbed up against his chest and I felt my nipples harden as they met the soft hair that grew there.

He brought his knees up and I leant back against them, straining my body backwards. I let my head drop back and my hair fell onto his calves. I was now fully exposed to him and I heard him groan as he said "I love looking at you Bella."

Edward rubbed his thumb lightly against my clitoris and then opened me out wider with his fingers as leaning back with my hands on the floor, I pushed myself onto him. Back and fore, I felt him slide in and out, as his fingers did wonderful things to my inner lips. His thumb more urgent now on my clitoris, I could feel my orgasm simmering ready to explode.

"Bella I want to see you come" his voice deepening with desire, and with these words my insides undulated with pleasure as Edward watched me orgasm, my legs widening with each shuddering breath.

I felt him spasm as he spilled into me, his face contorted in ecstasy.

He was the only man that could make me feel this way. He satisfied me in ways beyond my imagination, and if I were to lose him... unimaginable.

The following week, I agreed to go to see Rose, under Edward's insistence, as I hadn't spent any time with her in a while due to my over zealous protection detail.

I went one night as Edward was going to bed. This way we didn't miss each other too much, and it used up my time at night when he was asleep.

I reluctantly left him sleeping and seeing Rose again, realised I had made the right decision. We talked as we used to talk ; I had missed her cheery wit and foul mouth!

We were both engrossed in conversation when the door opened and Jacob stood there.

We stood up facing him, surprised by his appearance.

"I thought you had left the area?" Rose said.

"I had" Jacob replied, "but I've come back to warn you both."

"Warn us?" I asked. "About what?"

He looked sheepish and contrite. "I've done a very stupid thing" he said, sitting down in the nearest chair.

I felt that familiar shiver run down my body. My sixth sense had gone to major alert.

"You must understand that I was angry, Bella" he wheedled. "That Edward guy had come between us and nothing was the same!"

"Come between us? I questioned. "There was no "Us" to come between, you idiot!"

The feeling of dread got worse.

"What have you done, Jacob?" Rose asked intently.

He stood up and started pacing. "I was angry" he reiterated, "So I told Tanya about how you had fallen in love with a human."

"Why would that be of interest to her?" I asked, puzzled.

"That night in the gallery, she wanted him for herself, and her jealousy is something to behold. I might have also embellished on the way you had discarded and finished with me over him" he said, embarrassed at his actions.

"She also told me she was going to report you to the Volturi for telling a human about us, but I don't think she would have gone that far. I mean, she wouldn't, would she?"

"Jacob!" I wailed. "Do you realise what you've done?"

"Aro, came to see me!" I cried.

"Aro from the Volturi? asked Jacob.

"Yes, Aro from the fucking Volturi! I laughed hysterically, "Funnily enough, it turns out he was the one who changed me, so he was vastly interested in my life" I said with a sarcastic sneer.

Rose was aghast, "Aro came to see you? Fucking hell, Jacob, you have certainly made a fucking mess this time!"

"Look, I came to warn you didn't I?" he whined, besides it's not Aro you should be worried about."

"What do you mean, what else is there?" Rose and I asked together.

"You've forgotten about Tanya, she told me she was going to get Edward, and she always gets what she wants."

"Tanya!" ...All the talk of Aro and the Volturi had made me forget about an enemy closer to home and I had left Edward sleeping...and alone!

"I have to go, Edward is on his own!" I said, running toward the door.

"I'll drive you" Jacob said. I was about to refuse but his car would be quicker.

We piled in, Rose coming too. She said she didn't want to be left out of any action.

I fervently hoped that the only action would be Edward making love to me in the morning.

We got there at a speed I didn't want to think about and at first all seemed quiet.

Then Tanya's scent invaded the air, and I knew she was here. I only hoped I was not too late.

I crept up the stairs, followed closely by Jacob and Rose.

As I came into Edwards bedroom I saw Tanya leaning over him as he lay asleep.

A deep growl escaped from me and she whipped around surprised; so intent on her task, she had missed our entrance.

She crouched down, a hiss escaping, as her lips curled back and she bared her teeth.

Edward woke at the noise and leapt out of bed, astounded at what was taking place.

"Stay where you are Edward!" I cried out, my focus never wavering on the feral adversary in front of me.

Tanya turned her head from me to look at Edward with a lascivious smile on her face and my attention strayed toward Edward, fearing for his safety.

I realised too late it was a ruse, as Tanya seized her chance and launched herself at me, her dilated pupils centred in her icy cold eyes, her teeth exposed in a terrifying snarl and I thought "this is it" expecting my throat to be torn out at any minute.

"Nooooo" someone screamed and a blur passed in front of me as Jacob counter-attacked.

Unfortunately, in his haste to protect me, his throat was exposed and with one single tearing sound she ripped into throat, decapitating his head from his neck with a single bite.

Tanya screamed again in fury at the body at her feet, realising her chance at me had been foiled. Her attention once again turned toward to me and I heard Rose's answering growl.

Edward lost all control as he envisioned my fate matching Jacobs. My beautiful brave man who I loved with all my heart, defended me with his life.

He threw himself at Tanya, mistakenly hoping to get her off balance, forgetting in his haste the absolute strength vampires possessed. Hardly looking at him, she caught him with the back of her hand and smashed him in the chest. The sheer force of it sailed him through air and his back hit the stair railing and I heard his body topple down the stairs.

I couldn't move. My whole world just stopped.

Tanya looked to where Edward had fallen, another snarl emanating from her mouth as the object of her desires lay broken by her hand at the bottom of the stairs.

Without another thought, and with Tanya's attention elsewhere, a spine chilling scream reverberated through the room as Rose jumped up onto Tanya's back and with one sudden twist, broke her neck; the crack echoing audibly in the sudden silence.

As action flowed to my limbs again, I sped down the stairs.

Edward was unconscious but still alive, his breathing shallow, his legs laying at an unnatural angle.

Rose said she would take care of upstairs and she carried each body past me to burn in the garden. All trace of them had to be erased before I called emergency services.

The ambulance, with blue lights flashing, soon arrived. Rose and I went with Edward to hospital, informing the paramedics he had tripped on the stair carpet and fallen downstairs.

I was working on auto-pilot, my actions robotic and clockwork.

Until I knew how Edward was, I had to keep it together.

We waited anxiously in the waiting room for what seemed like forever.

I paced up and down, I couldn't just sit.

My mind was whirling with disjointed thoughts as I realised all my worst fears had come true.

My one recurring thought was that if Edward had never met me, he would still be all right, still typing away at his book, still singing his songs.

The doctor finally came to see us and asked us to sit down.

"After extensive tests" he said kindly, I'm afraid Mr Cullen has fractures in both legs, his hip and I'm afraid his spine is broken in two places."

"Fortunately there was no internal bleeding and a CT scan showed no contusions on his brain."

I was overjoyed. "So he will be okay eventually?" I asked hopefully.

"He should make a full recovery" the doctor replied, but with a sad smile in my direction said, "He will, however, never walk again as one of the breaks snapped his spinal cord.

I felt Rose's arm go around me but I never heard if the doctor said any more. The sound in the waiting room became muffled and all my senses stopped at once.

Rose became alarmed when I never moved, when I turned to stone. No human could stay as still as a vampire and my behaviour would become noticeable.

She helped me to my feet and slowly propelled me out of the hospital to our car.

I still couldn't move. We got back to our house and she laid me on my bed.

A vampire in shock cannot be helped by hot sweet tea or a soothing hand rub. No analgesic will take away the pain or sleeping pill knock you out.

Rose just did what she had done before. She lay next to me on the bed but instead of taking my hand in hers, she simply opened her arms and I fell into them. I cried dry tears all night, the pain in my chest unbearable as heaving sobs racked my body.

Rose could do nothing to ease my misery, except hold me tight, rocking me.

In one night, my whole world had come crashing down and I floated alone on an empty sea, with no horizen in sight.


	11. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Three months passed before I brought Edward home from hospital. In that time he organised someone to construct invalid aids in his house, so he could be totally independent of everyone, including me.

He went religiously to the rehabilitation classes to improve his upper body strength, determined never to be a burden to anyone.

I visited him every day, and to all intents and purposes our conversations sounded normal on the surface. We discussed usual every day things, how he could get back to writing another novel when he was of hospital, Rose's latest sculpture or her last funny outburst, even mundane topics like the weather, but underneath I knew he was hurting and desperately trying to hide it from me.

Only once,when he seemed particularly low, did the subject come up about us being together.

"Bella" he said softly, taking my hand in his," I know you will hate me for saying this, but I would never think less of you if you decided not to stay."

I went to interrupt, but his hand came up to stop me.

"Please let me finish, its something that needs to be said and it's been on my mind for a while now."

He paused, searching in his mind for the right words.

"This is me now, forever in this wheelchair Bella, and you are a...a forever young, vibrant woman, with centuries ahead of her"...he smiled sadly at his own joke.

You need someone who can love you and care for you, so if you ever find you cannot handle this, then you can go with my blessing and all my love."

I sat and stared at his beautiful face, now etched with sadness, and taking my hand from beneath his, I reached out and caressed his cheek.

"Edward, I will only say this once and we will never speak of it again. Okay?"

He nodded his answer, and I carried on speaking...

"I loved you from the moment I first set eyes on you, and that has never changed, nor will it. I belong with you Edward, I always have. This is our fate and whatever we do or decide in this life or the next, we will still be together, because that is how it's meant to be."

I told him then of my discovery of the fact we were twin flame soul mates, and he smiled at the notion.

"So you see Edward, I'm staying right by your side whether you want me to or not. You can't get rid of me that easily!" I said lightly, reaching over and kissing him on the cheek.

"Besides, I have all the time in the world..."

Our lives carried on as near to normal after he came home. Emmett, Jasper and Alice came and visited once a week and they had jamming sessions together playing their instruments, laughing and joking like old times.

Edward refused to sing any more on stage, said his heart wasn't in it yet, and we never pushed him.

Although these visits were always happy occasions, when they were saying their goodbyes, Emmett always had a sad expression on his face and Alice could never stop that one tear from escaping from her eye. Jasper never said anything, too afraid of totally breaking down, which he knew would help no-one. His bottom lip was ragged through biting down on it so often.

Rose was her usual smart- alec self, always making him laugh and never once treating him any different than she did before and I knew he was grateful for this, although he never brought it up because he knew it would embarrass her.

He was the most kindest, unselfish man I knew, and I loved him dearly.

I had regular long chats with Rose ; it was my way of keeping sane. I off-loaded onto her all my worries and anxieties and she took it all on her shoulders without complaint. She was my rock, the one true constant in my life and I would have been lost without her.

Many were the nights I cried in her arms when it all got a little too much, or we would just sit, not speaking, comfortable in each others company.

Fortune came knocking on my door in abundance the day she walked into my life.

She was older than I, with the wisdom that centuries had bestowed on her, and she told me later, that when she first saw me, something pinged in her chest.

I had been living rough, with no home to go back to as the sight of me would have scared my parents to death. My eyes were permanently ice blue then, as they are in all "newborn" vampires and my hunger for blood was insatiable.

I survived on rats in the beginning, I simply couldn't take a humans blood. Maybe I was different from other vampires, but the idea was abhorrent to me.

With my new found speed, I quickly travelled to the country where bigger kills could be found. This is where Rose found me, hiding out in a barn, filthy and bedraggled, my long blonde hair matted with blood as I gorged on one of the farmer's cows.

She said I looked like an animal myself, all guttural growls, my blue laser eyes glaring wildly and the smell emanating from my person nearly had her heaving.

The all abiding feeling that washed over her however, was a deep sorrow for such a beautiful young woman to have been reduced to this level.

She took me back to her house, cleaned me up and started to instruct me in the ways of the vampire.

I have been with her ever since and have never looked back.

The weeks passed and the days grew shorter, as Christmas was nearly upon us.

I put up a tree and Edward helped me to decorate it.

I wanted our first Christmas together to be extra special, a time for celebration that we were together, but Edward seemed to close in on himself even more.

He tried, he really tried, to join in the festivities on Christmas Day, as Emmett and his girlfriend Victoria, Jasper and Alice and Rose and myself sat around the dining table that was groaning under the weight of food.

Rose and I merely pushed the food around on our plates of course, but nobody noticed.

Crackers were pulled, carols sung, and a blazing plum pudding was brought out to tumultuous applause.

In the evening we all played Scrabble, which eventually ended in fits of laughter as Emmett kept putting naughty rude words down on the board.

By 9 pm, Edward excused himself, apologising profusely, saying he was very tired and thought it best he went to bed.

He wouldn't let me go up with him, saying I had guests, so I told him I would be up later.

Jasper watched him go, a melancholy expression on his face and asked me how he was doing.

" He's not too bad", I said, "he has good days and bad days, but he's getting there."

"Don't you think he's lost quite a bit of weight? His face is looking really gaunt."

"Do you think so?" I queried. Maybe because I was so close to him, I hadn't noticed.

I was mortified to think I had missed this but Jasper said because I was with Edward everyday, it was less noticeable to me.

They left soon after, all agreeing it had been a wonderful day and thanking me for their Christmas dinner.

Rose was the last to go, giving me a big hug as she was leaving.

With a note of caution in her voice she said "Watch him, Bella."

"What do you mean?" I asked worriedly.

"I can take a step back from this and view the situation from a different aspect, and my sixth sense nose is fucking twitching."

"There is something amiss but I don't know what. It's probably me being all bloody fanciful, but it won't hurt to keep a closer eye on him."

She hugged me again, and with a kiss on the cheek she drove away into the night.

I locked up and turned off all the lights downstairs before going up to our bedroom.

As I peered in through the doorway, I was surprised to see Edward had the bedside lamp on, and was still awake. He had a notepad in his hand scribbling away and my initial thought was that he had decided to start writing again.

As I came through the door, he looked startled, as though he had been caught doing something he shouldn't.

"What's this? I asked, the joy written all over my face, "You've decided to start writing again?

"Uh...yes, ...I..uh..thought it was time I put pen to paper. I must be getting bored with your company!" he said , tongue in cheek. It was so lovely to see that grin light up his face as it once did.

He had the sexiest grin in the whole world.

He pushed the notepad in the drawer by the side of the bed and pulled back the covers for me to join him. I quickly undressed and snuggled into his arms. He held me, caressing my arm with a soft touch."You do know I love you, don't you Bella?" he said. I peered up at him, wondering where this had come from. "Yes, of course I do." I looked puzzled and he just laughed and said "I don't think I've said it much lately, that's all."

I leaned in and kissed him, surprised when his mouth opened and his tongue slipped in between my lips. He kissed me like before and I kissed him back; my mouth greedily sucking his lips. He then kissed the end of my nose and said "Goodnight Bella."

His arms went around me and I felt safe again, cocooned in his warm embrace.

I loved this time of night as I listened to his heartbeat; the steady drum slowing as he fell into a deep sleep.

With his eyes closed, his face was smooth, all sadness erased. He looked so young then and my love for him brimmed over.

If he was starting to write again, then Rose must be wrong and I felt reassured when he had kissed me.

I lay in his arms as he slept, hoping everything would be all right.

I had to believe it would.

A few days later, we sat outside. It was a beautiful crisp winter's day, the sun was shining and the previous nights frost was lit up like fairy lights under it's glare.

I asked him if he was okay for an hour as I needed to see Rose about something and he insisted he was fine. I had wrapped him in a blanket over his knees, his overcoat collar turned up and a scarf tied at his neck.

The pallor of his face alarmed me a little, but when I mentioned it he said " It's bloody cold, Bella, don't be silly!"

"Go and see Rose, he added. "Don't worry, if I get too cold I can wheel myself indoors. Besides, you're getting on my nerves" he smiled cheekily.

I ran upstairs to get my jacket. I didn't really need one as I didn't feel the cold but I would've looked strange to others wearing only jeans and a top in the middle of winter.

I was reaching into the wardrobe when I noticed a piece of paper sticking out of the bedside drawer.

Pulling it open, Edwards notepad lay on top. I went to shut it but my curiosity was too great and I wanted to see what he had written.

It wasn't the start of a book but a letter to me. I quickly put it into my pocket as now wasn't the time to read it.

I kissed Edward on the cheek, saying I wouldn't be long and drove away, my hands tightly gripping the steering wheel.

I didn't go to Rose's . I stopped at a lay-by about a mile further on and pulled the notebook from my pocket.

In his flowing handwriting, I read:

My dearest Isabella,

There, that got your attention didn't it? I almost never call you Isabella but I thought on this occasion it warranted the formality! I have left this letter for you in the hope I might try to explain my decision, as it was not one I took lightly. It wasn't that I was afraid; death for me now is a welcome release.

I am more heartbroken that I have left you. You were my sun and my moon, and my days started and ended with you. In the short time we were together, you brought more joy to my life than I thought possible. Admittedly there were a few hairy moments, but I knew what I was taking on when I fell in love with you.

And I fell so hard, my beautiful girl; I would miss you when you left the room. Your beauty never failed to enthrall me. When you smiled, the rest of the world ceased to exist.

I never wanted this to end, but now that it has, I don't want you to be sad. I want you to be happy for the time we had. We shared more love in that short time than most do in a lifetime.

To hold you and not be able to love you is more than I can bear. This empty shell I now inhabit is crippling my mind as well as my body and I know, with time I would have become bitter and twisted with the inadequacy it brought me. I want you to think of me when I was virile and strong, ready to sweep you off your feet at a moments notice!

Go on with your life now without me, but remember I will never be far away. If, as you say, we are twin flame soul mates, I will find you again. I will never ever stop searching.

I love you Bella, I will love you till the end of time... death is not the end, its just the beginning of our next life together.

All my love, always,

Edward.

X

I sat in the car, the letter still held in my hands, my mouth a distortion in it's agony.

He was going to kill himself! I tried and I tried but I couldn't get my head around that. Why would he want to leave me? Why did he think I would be better off without him?

I drove as though my life depended on it, back to his house, to find him wheeling himself in from the garden.

He looked up at my wretched face and saw the notebook in my hand .

His head fell back and he just stared up at the sky.

"You weren't supposed to find that yet." he said quietly.

I dropped down on my knees and put my head in his lap.

"Don't leave me Edward, please I beg you, don't leave me."

I turned my face up to his and his breath caught in his throat at the agony he saw there.

"Oh Bella, I never wanted to hurt you, but you must see this will only get worse."

"I don't want you to watch me slowly deteriorate, to feel your pity."

"But I don't care Edward, I just want you with me, I pleaded, my hands reaching to hold his as though this act would prevent him from going.

"_I_ care Bella, I care that one day you will look at me and your love will be replaced by something else, something untenable. That would kill me then.

"I would NEVER look at you like that, never! I love you too much!"

"You are looking at me with love filled eyes Bella, but take a close look at me now."

I stared at him, wondering what he meant, when I realised how thin his face had become. How dark the shadows were underneath his eyes. His legs, once so thick and strong were now stick like, the muscles wasted away from never moving.

He was slowly dying in front of me and I had chosen to ignore it. My mind had refused to accept what was happening.

"Oh god, Edward, I love you so much, I didn't want to know."

He reached down and guided me onto his lap and took me into his arms.

"Shush now, please don't cry. You know I hate seeing you like this."

"Will you promise me something Edward?"

He looked at me, a question on his face.

"Don't do anything yet, will you? Give me until Spring ." Before he could ask why, I just said I would cope better with the start of a fresh new season. A new growth, a new beginning for me.

He seemed to accept this and we went back in together, a resigned acceptance weighing us down.

That night , when he was asleep, I went back to my sanctuary on the rooftops.

I knew I had until Spring to think up a plan.

I stood with my face turned up to the dark and stormy sky and I screamed. I held my hands aloft and I screamed a blood curdling howl of rage, misery and agony. What people thought that night I didn't know, as dogs everywhere started barking and howling in response.

I didn't particularly care.

All I knew was that gorgeous man I loved with all my heart was dying and I wanted to kill the world with my bare hands at the injustice of it.


	12. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining and the apple tree in the garden was laden with blossom, it's boughs nearly breaking under the weight.

It was the beginning of May and new growth was sprouting everywhere, as insects pollinated every flower and shrub with indecent haste.

Edward was in the garden, staring into space. I watched him from the doorway for a moment, hidden from view.

I heard him sigh as a butterfly came to rest on his arm, wings glistening with iridescent colours, open to the sun. My breath caught in my throat as I watched a single tear roll down Edward's cheek, and I felt my self break into a million pieces.

He had kept his promise. Nothing more was mentioned about that day, when I had discovered his suicide letter.

Winter had fallen into Spring with open arms and I had had to watch Edward slowly fall apart as the months went by.

He had developed pneumonia twice, the last bout merely weeks ago and I had thought I was going to lose him. He fought back with a bravery that astounded me but it had left him evermore increasingly weak.

His body, that glorious body that had taken me to never before found heights, now sat wasting away. Shrunken beyond belief, he was a mere shadow of his former self. Sometimes, I expected to find just his coat, as if he had vanished away into thin air; the last thread attaching him to earth finally snapping free.

As I approached him in the garden, he surreptitiously wiped away the tear and turned to smile at me, holding out his hand for mine.

"It's a beautiful day" he said, "mother nature has been working overtime" he laughed. It was a sad laugh, as he realised mother nature couldn't work her miracles on him.

"Edward, we need to talk" I said, pulling up a garden chair next to him.

A serious accepting expression came over his face as if he already knew what was coming.

"I asked you to give me until Spring, and now it's here. I know what it's taken out of you to grant me this and I love you even more for it."

"I know you want to end your suffering, and I accept that now."

He grasped my hand in his, "Oh Bella, I know how hard this is for you, but it is the right thing to do."

"Can I ask one more favour of you?" I asked.

"Anything" he said. "What is it?"

My voice broke as I asked, "Can I be with you at the end?"

He went to protest but took one look at my eyes pleading with him, and gently nodded his head, too emotional to answer.

I took a moment to compose myself before continuing.

"We will have to let Emmett know, and Jasper and Alice. They will probably try to change your mind but I think they will accept it in the end."

I carried on talking. Now that this had finally been agreed, I needed to focus on action, rather than think about what would happen.

"I have an island in the Pacific." I announced. Edward looked at me astonished.

"Rose and I bought it many, many years ago when land was cheap. A couple I employ check on the house I have there to maintain the property and the grounds."

"It's a beautiful place, totally deserted. I had hoped we could spend time there together, just the two of us, when you had finished your book. Unfortunately, other events got in the way" I said with a wry grin."Other events" barely covered the walking catastrophe that was Tanya Denali.

"The island is called Renesmee, its a mixture of our mothers' names" I explained.

"I don't want it to happen here, I want it somewhere magical, in a place I can return to on my own and remember our last days together."

"I'd like to spend a week there first Edward, before...before..."

I couldn't finish the sentence, so I laid my head on Edward's shoulder, valiantly trying to hold the tears at bay.

"Bella, I would like that" he said simply, emotion changing the timbre of his voice. "I would like that very much."

I arranged for Emmett, Jasper and Alice to come and spend an evening with us to inform them of our plans. I invited Rose too, as she was family, and I needed her by my side for moral support.

Gathered together, I explained to them what we were about to embark on and Emmett immediately jumped to his feet, exclaiming "You can't be serious about this!"

Jasper grabbed his arm and pulled him back down. "Sit down Emmett, and think about what they want and not what you want." He looked at Edward and said "I'm surprised you waited this long, old friend. I've been waiting for something like this for weeks."

The sadness in his face as he gazed on his best friend was a sight I never want to see again.

He went over and put his hand on Edwards shoulder and said with a break in his voice "What ever you want to do, big guy,and I'm behind you, one hundred per cent."

Edward clasped the hand on his shoulder, and looked up at him with gratitude.

Alice by now had tears streaming down her face as she took in the touching scene and the reality of what was about to happen, finally hitting her.

I went to her and gathered her in my arms as Emmett knelt at Edward's feet and asked "Is this what you really want, bro?"

"Yeah , it is, Em, I've had a great life, had the best family and friends a guy could wish for and loved the girl of my dreams. How many people can say that?" he said with a sad smile.

I told them of our plans to go to my island next week, so they all one by one clutched Edward to their chest as they said their last goodbyes.

Emmett left quickly, not being able to hold himself together any longer, and Alice kissed Edward on the cheek and told him she loved him. Jasper knelt at his side holding onto the arm of Edwards wheelchair with a fierce intensity.

"I love you man, I couldn't have wished for a better friend .Maybe we'll get to jam together on the other side one day, yeah?" he asked, his voice breaking, as tears rolled down his face.

I had to look away as Edward leaned forward and grabbed Jasper in a hug .

"Yeah" he said gruffly, as the tears brimmed over, "try keeping me away."

Jasper quickly rose and with one last look at Edward, took hold of Alice's hand and walked out of the house.

Rose went over to Edward, giving his hand a squeeze and said to me "I will see you both before you go. " She gave me a hug as she went and we were finally on our own.

!I love you, y'know" I said. "I know" Edward answered holding his hand out to me "Come here, you."

The sea plane touched down on the gentle waves and taxied to a landing jetty, protruding from the beach.

Mr and Mrs Clearwater had stocked the house with fresh food and cleaned and aired out the rooms, and were waiting to board the sea plane for the journey back.

The pilot helped Edward into his wheelchair and I thanked them all for their help.

The plane took off into a clear blue sky and we were alone in paradise.

I pushed Edward up to the low one story house that nestled between swaying palm trees. It had a verandah all the way around where you could sit and take in the beautiful landscape.

Large wide windows faced the beach and the rooms were spacious and airy, with pale beech furniture and mosaic tiled floors, scattered with soft rugs.

Our bedroom had a huge four poster canopied bed with white muslin curtains to keep any straying insects out.

I unpacked our things and settled Edward in the huge wicker sofa on the verandah, where I joined him after preparing a light snack. He picked at the food as his appetite now was almost non-existent, but we sat and held hands as the sea lapped against the shore.

I never wanted that week to end. It was as if a heavy load had been lifted from our shoulders and this gave us the freedom to enjoy each other without restraint.

During the day we would sit and talk or I would carry him down to the beach and watch the seagulls as they milled around in the sky.

The nights were spent holding each other, both of us wanting to enjoy every last minute we had together.

The day dawned when I could put it off no longer, and as we watched the sun come up together, I asked him if he was ready.

"I will never be ready to leave you" he said "But I think it's time for me to go."

Jasper had given me the concoction of sleeping pills that Edward was to take, saying that he would just drift off to sleep, never to waken again.

I prepared the drink, dissolving the sleeping tablets within, and handed it to Edward.

I sat next to him on the bed as he held the glass in his hand, and we looked at each with a longing we couldn't hide. "I love you Isabella Swan. Death will never change that."

He smiled that sexy smile once more and said " Humphrey Bogart had it right,... here's looking at you, kid" and with a soft caress to my face, he downed the drink in one go.

I held him as his eyes slowly closed and his breathing got deeper.

Jasper told me that it would take about half an hour, and the thought that I would never hold him again drove me to cry out in pain.

"Oh my god, Edward, I can't let you go, I just can't" I cried, holding his wasted body in my arms.

He might hate me forever for what I was about to do, but I would rather be without him knowing he was somewhere in the world than allow the travesty of his death to continue.

A vampires teeth look totally normal, but when they bite, two fangs are unsheathed from the upper incisors, as they drop down into place. They are hollow and blood can be drained easily. We also have a toxic venom in our arsenal mixed with a coagulant that thins the blood.

I exposed Edward's neck and could still see the carotid artery pulsating there.

I had never done this before, I had never felt the need to turn someone. I didn't know how much venom would be needed. Too little and he would die from the drugs he had taken. Too much and I would kill him.

I agonised over my decision but I had little choice as he was going to die anyway. I now knew I could never let that happen.

I felt my teeth pierce through his skin with ease, my fangs finding the artery, and I began to suck his blood while my venom circulated around his body.

He tasted so sweet, like warm honey and an intoxicating taste swirled around my mouth and tongue.

Now I understood why there were not many "vegetarian " vampires around.

I felt it slide down my throat like fine wine and a low growl started in my throat, as a frenzy started to build up inside me.

I wanted to drain him of his blood completely, the erotic vibration taking possession of me, as the continued leeching of his blood into my mouth gave an exquisite sensation to my body.

The realisation of what I was doing hit me hard and I pulled away from him with a howl.

God, I had nearly killed him! I wiped my mouth, determined to finish this without losing control again.

I lifted up his arm and found the brachial artery in the crook of his arm.

Breaking the skin with my teeth , my venom flowed in and I sucked his blood again, this time taking care not to lose focus.

Finally, I bit my own hand and making a fist, I let my blood trickle into his mouth, completing the circle.

There was nothing more I could do. If I hadn't given him enough, he would be dead in about fifteen minutes. After that, it took about three days for the venom to work and to change him.

Fifteen minutes passed and he still breathed so I knew the amount of venom had been sufficient.

For the next three days I never left his side. He tossed and turned as the fever took hold. I stripped him of his clothes and positioned two fans to cool his body, as his sweat soaked the sheets under him.

By the third day, late in the afternoon, there was still no change. I couldn't stand watching the pain he was going through any longer and I ran out of the house down to the beach.

"Maybe I've done something wrong" I wailed to the sky, my hands pulling at my hair.

I walked through the sand to the end of the beach and sat and watched the sea beat it's hypnotic rhythm against the shore.

Hugging my knees to my chest, a keening sound escaped from my lips, in tune with the lonesome sound of the birds whirling in the sky. I recited a mantra over and over "Please make him be okay, please make him be okay..."

As the afternoon began to draw to a close, the clouds started to gather force, turning the sky a dull grey colour. The humidity was still hot and sultry as I felt the first raindrop plop against my skin.

Out of my periphery vision I spotted a movement to my right. I stood up craning my eyes to see what it was.

I could make out a lone figure in the distance slowly walking toward me.

I started to walk, gaining speed, as the sight before me filled me with a joy I had never believed possible.

He had pulled on his low slung jeans and a white shirt flapped open, exposing his chest.

I started running, laughing and crying at the same time and as I slammed into his body. I leapt into his waiting arms and locked my legs around his waist.

"Oh Edward" I cried, "it's you, it's you, it worked" My hands framed his face as I kissed him, kissed him with all the love I had in my body.

"Do you forgive me?" I asked. His pale icy blue eyes stared at me, the love shining out of them.

"There is nothing to forgive" he replied. "We are together and that's all that matters."

The rain was pelting down now drenching our bodies. His white shirt clung to him, as the rain made it see-through and I could make out the muscles bunching underneath.

We ran back to the house and never made it to the bedroom. All the pent up desires that had been put on hold because of his injuries now came to the surface.

He slammed me up against the wall and bits of plaster fell off. I had my legs around his middle again as our lips and tongues worked on each other. We devoured each other, tearing each others clothes off as we fell to the floor. All finesse was forgotten as we bit and licked and kissed.

He pushed my legs apart, pushing my knees up and entered me in one swift motion. I cried out with the intensity it created, my body raising up to envelop him deeper.. Now he was a vampire, I had no need to hold back any longer, as I growled and bucked underneath him. I could feel the wetness seeping out of me as each thrust took me to greater heights. I no longer had to keep my venom juices enclosed, and his penis slid in and out within my moist wet folds with ease.

He put his finger onto my clitoris and began to rub the soft wet nub until it swelled with desire.

Lifting me up even further, I felt him enter me even more deeply, filling me with his hardness, his long thick shaft pulling out and entering, again and again. By now I was writhing uncontrollably as the ecstasy built up in my body , until with one final thrust, I went over the edge, spirally away. He convulsed against me as his body went into spasm as the orgasm hit. Coming , over and over, he emptied himself into me, draining himself of his essence.

We lay there not moving, until he rolled onto his back and I moved into his arms.

I studied him in detail, now that our desires had been satisfied.

At first glance, he was the same as before the accident but looking more closely there were quite a few differences to be seen.

His hair was thicker and more lustrous. His skin was pale and smooth as marble, his jawline standing out in relief. His lips were fuller now and softer and his eyes now matched mine in their icy blue colour. With his pupils dilated to a black dot, he looked like some hybrid, alien god lying beside me.

His broad chest, thick with hair, revealed muscles that had not been there before. His long legs were now the strong limbs I remembered, no longer withered and thin.

I smiled as I looked at his cock, now lying soft against his thigh. I snickered, even that was thicker and longer.

" Seen enough?" he growled, his voice deep and masculine. I had to get used to that too!

I peeked up at him through the tendrils of my hair that now was wild and free.

"Hmm" I said, "I'll let you know."

He grabbed me then and said menacingly " I want a word with you, young lady!"

"When I ask for something I expect to get it done." the chastising tone was lost with the twinkle in his eye.

"Oh Edward, I just couldn't let you die when I knew I could make you immortal like me. Do you hate me?"

"Hate you? I could never hate you, silly girl. I never asked you to change me because I never wanted to heap that responsibility onto you, to put that pressure at your door. I knew if anything had gone wrong, you would never have forgiven yourself if you had killed me."

"I couldn't never have asked you to do that for me."

I kissed his neck, tasting the sweetness of his skin. "I would do anything for you, you know that Edward."

To deal with my need for blood, I kept a herd of wild pigs on the island, so I showed Edward how to slake his now almighty need for blood with one of these animals. He took to it like a...well, like a vampire. Watching him feed, that first time, I marvelled how well he had acclimatised to the vampire condition, as though he were born to it. Of course, if my twin flame theory was correct, he had been one in another life, with me.

We spent another week on the island. Each day brought a whole new emotion. He jokingly kept batting me away because I kept staring at him. I couldn't take my eyes off him.

He was so beautiful and I had so very nearly lost him forever, how could I not keep staring?

We made love in the surf, the force of the water heightening the sensation.

The first time we used the bed, we broke it.

Edward had run in from the beach with me in his arms and had thrown me on the bed, diving on top. Not used to the strength he now possessed, the bed broke in half with the force, the canopy falling on top of us shrouding us in the white material. The laughter rocked us, as we collapsed in a fit of giggles.

Our love making took on an urgency as we couldn't get enough of each other. This was helped by the fact that Edward no longer needed to sleep , so nights were spent enjoying each others bodies until the sun came up.

Soon it was back to reality as we had to come up with a plan. How would we be able to explain away Edward's ability to walk and the obvious difference in his body, I didn't know. The last Emmett had seen of his brother, was of a pale emaciated body in a wheelchair and not this strapping god that strode down the beach by my side, stopping every now and then to pull me to his hard body and kissing me till I dropped.

When he held me like that, I felt we could take on the world, as long as we had each other.

I never felt any sixth sense stirrings warning me, so perhaps everything would be okay.

I hoped so, as nothing would be able to wipe this grin from my face


	13. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

We decided to come home and make our decision in more familiar surroundings.

The plane picked us up at the jetty; luckily a different pilot manned the controls and we were soon on our way.

We spent the first couple of days and nights in bed, still not getting enough of each other.

With stamina no longer an issue, our lovemaking took on a whole new dimension.

He would catch me unawares, hoist me over his shoulder, like that first giddy night, and throw me on the bed, shredding my clothes in the process.

I loved this animal side to him now. Whereas before the change, he had always been a very "masculine" man, now testosterone oozed out of every pore.

It was such a pleasure for me not to hold back in case I hurt him, this time letting him be more dominant. It brought out my feminine side, leaving me with a sense of vulnerability, which was an odd sensation for an invincible vampire to feel.

I phoned Rose to tell her I was home, without giving her any details. If there was a problem to be solved, Rose could usually find a solution. Living for centuries had given her an insight few others held.

She came to the house meeting me with open arms, ready to embrace me in my misery. I hugged her back but she pulled away from me, looking puzzled. I was not the distraught girl she expected to find.

I smiled, took hold of her hand and drew her through the French doors, out into the garden.

Her eyes popped out of her head as she took in the sight before her.

"Well, fuck me" she breathed.

Edward was chopping logs. He was standing barefoot, his low slung jeans barely staying up as his exertions caused them to dip even lower than usual. The sexy trail of dark hair was even more exposed, lying between the curved v shape of his hip bones.

The muscles rippled in his body ; the sun highlighting every tendon and sinew. His arm came down in an arc, the action causing the biceps to curl and flex. .

He chuckled to himself with every downward swing, as his hand cleaved through each chunk of wood. He didn't need the axe and he found the novelty highly amusing.

With a knowing look at me Rose said breathlessly "He's fucking magnificent."

"Mmm" I murmured, "I know."

We went back indoors , and Rose sat down and simply said "Okay, tell me all."

I revealed to her of that awful day Edward nearly ended his life and how I couldn't let it happen. She nodded knowingly at this but let me continue.

When I told her how distraught I had got, thinking I had killed him, she grasped my hand to comfort me. Remembering that day made me shudder as I relived how close I had been to losing him forever. It was in sharp contrast to the formidable specimen chopping logs outside.

"It had occurred to me that this was a solution you hadn't explored but when the subject was never brought up, I concluded this was something Edward didn't want" Rose said as she leaned back in her chair.

"Edward said he didn't want to put that responsibility on my shoulders in case anything had gone wrong" I replied.

"Unselfish till the end" she smiled wryly. "You don't realise how lucky you are to find someone like him." She looked off dreamily into the distance, her thoughts elsewhere.

"Rose!... "Earth to Rose" I said snapping my fingers in front of her face. "Where did you go then?"

She grinned and said "Never you mind!"

"So what are you going to tell the others?"she enquired, changing the subject.

"I really don't know what to do, Rose. If I tell them he's dead, it means we would have to move away, and he would never see his brother or Jasper again, but how can I tell them he is a vampire?" My voice had taken on a desperate tone.

"I also thought of telling them a miracle had occurred when he found he could walk again." She looked at me in disbelief. "I know, I know, that's just as unbelievable as the vampire scenario, besides it wouldn't explain how...how he ..."

"How fucking hot he looks now?" Rose said, chuckling as she interrupted me with her usual one liner.

We both dissolved into the giggles as Edward came striding through the door, his aura of masculinity surrounding him like a cloak.

Rose stood up. Looked at him, then at me, and said with an inward smile, "I'll leave you two alone and I will give the current problem my devoted attention."

She kissed me on the cheek and was gone.

I stared at Edward, standing there in his jeans looking fucking hot as hell.

His hair had fallen over one eye again giving him a slightly rakish look, and the hair on his chest cried out for my hands.

I raised an eyebrow and enquired "Finished having fun outside?"

"Yeah, I got bored with that so I came looking for more tactile stimulation." His hand brushed a curl behind my ear. My breath hitched, as he leaned in and kissed my neck.

"Tactile stimulation?" I stammered.

"Yeah" he growled, sending a shiver down my spine "Y'know, tactile, as in a hundred and one ways to touch, using hands and mouth." He continued with the onslaught of my neck, moving from my jawline and gradually working his way down to my collar bone.

"A hundred and one ways?" I repeated...Oh god...

"I shall endeavour to try" he said lustily pushing me down on the sofa.

I fell backwards, my breathing getting faster as he loomed over me.

I was wearing a white strappy sun dress, which buttoned up the middle, and he got on his knees and slowly unbuttoned each one.

He started from the bottom, kissing my inner thighs as more flesh was revealed.

"You have got great fucking legs" he murmured, almost to himself.

He finished his task with a slowness that had me wriggling with impatience.

My dress completely open now, he gazed at my body, raking it with his eyes.

I could see his pupils getting ever smaller in his pale blue eyes as the lustful thoughts invaded his mind.

I had white lacy panties on and he leaned in and bit them apart with his teeth, the stubble on his jaw tickling my hip bone.

He gently pushed apart my legs, staring at the mound of pubic hair and my womanly centre within.

His fingers moved apart my velvet folds and he continued gazing at me, drinking in every part of me.

"I love looking at you, at this beautiful portal that holds me in its grasp, that folds around me like a glove."

His words sent a stab of desire through me as did his voyeuristic actions on my most intimate parts.

He leaned in, his fingers sliding into me, wet now with longing, and his tongue lapped at my clitoris with an expertise second to none.

He sucked, bringing it to a swollen erect peak, as his fingers, one by one, moved in and out, with increasing urgency. I was out of my mind now as the stimulation increased, his tongue joining his fingers, licking and probing me inside.

"Come for me Isabella, let my tongue fuck you to oblivion" The use of my full name used in context with the sexual talk, sent me wild. My body writhed and bucked under his mouth.

His head was right up against my pubic bone, his long tongue inside me and I looked down and saw his blue eyes staring right back at me.

The visual of this intimate sexual act sent a tightening to my belly as I experienced the most out of this fucking world, orgasm. Every part of my body trembled as the familiar waves crashed over me, making me cry out, again and again.

He took his tongue away as the tremors started to slow and with a swift movement only a vampire can achieve, I found myself sitting astride him, in the blink of an eye.

"Put your hands on your head, Bella, pull up your hair."

I did as he asked, complaining a little as I wanted to touch him.

"I want to try something a bit different, Bella... I think you will enjoy it, in fact I know you will"

He looked at me with his blue, blue eyes glazing over with an uncontrollable lust.

This was the "new" Edward, the Edward I couldn't get enough of.

He put his hands under my armpits and positioned me on him, slowly bringing me down on his shaft. With his new found vampire strength, he lifted me up and down on his hard erection, impaling me with every upward thrust.

The sensation of being moved up and down, without moving my own body was incredible.

The lift and then the downward stroke brought an intensity to the action, as he would alternate between swift strokes or keeping me suspended in a mind blowing expectation before pushing me down onto him again.

I could feel myself getting wetter as my vampire juices welled out of me. The excruciatingly intense action was making me growl and yell as I let myself go. He kept me suspended too long over him at one point and I could feel my insides begging for release.

"No, Edward, don't fucking stop, please don't stop" and he brought me down again, my body shuddering with satisfaction.

"Look at me Bella, keep looking at me, watch me as I come, watch me as we come together."

He pulled me down on him again, my body taking him all in with a tightness as another orgasm climaxed through me. Watching his face as he cried out, as his shaft emptied inside me with each spasm, his eyes staring back at me, was an erotic fantasy come to life.

I fell onto him, as the shudders slowly died, still feeling his cock twitch inside me.

"You are going to be the death of me" I groaned.

"Mmm", he whispered against my neck, "Although I think I'll take a few thousand years to do it."

God, I loved him.

About two weeks later we were in the garden. It was a beautiful summer's day. The sky was a deep blue and white fluffy marshmallow clouds dotted the sky.

The sound of bees going about their business as they pollinated each eagerly awaiting flower made me think of Edward and me. He was my bee and I was his flower, all my buds quivering, ready to open at his touch. I smiled at the analogy; whenever he was by me I was always buzzing with excitement.

We were lying side by side on the warm grass, staring up at the sky, trying to make rude shapes out of the clouds.

"That is definitely a rather large dick right there" he pointed. "Even puts mine to shame" he chuckled.

I leant over and thumped him on his chest, "Modesty is a virtue, you know." I said.

He pulled my lips down to his ..."Shut up, I'm a vampire, modesty now no longer exists" he said cheekily. "Anyway, you were only saying the other day how big my dick was...

I clamped my mouth down on his to shut him up, trying in vain not to giggle at the same time.

"Bella?" I shot up as I heard someone call my name.

In our absorption of each other, we hadn't heard the side gate to the garden opening.

I just caught sight of Jasper striding angrily away.

"Oh my god, no" I cried. I leapt up, running around to the front of the house to get to Jasper before he left. I caught him just before he got into his car.

"It's not what you think" I pleaded, cringing inwardly as I heard myself say that tired old cliché .

"It never fucking is!" he spat. "You couldn't give him the respect he deserved by at least waiting a decent length of time before embarking on some new affair?

"But...but I..."I tried to interrupt, stammering in my haste to get the right words out. What the right words were in this case, I had no idea.

"You can't talk your way out of this" he yelled angrily, his face white with a mixture of hurt and fury.

"You fucking slut!" he shouted, "he's been dead less than a month and you've brought someone else into his bed, you...you... fucking whore."

A deep voice interrupted us: "Are you calling my woman, a slut AND a whore? That's a bit over the top, don't you think Jasper?"

Jasper looked over my shoulder and staggered back into his car and fell onto his backside.

I closed my eyes and thought: "Now the cat's out of the bag" and felt a smidgen of relief that the decision had now been taken out of our hands.

Edward strode forward, pulling Jasper up from his crumpled position on the floor.

He had put on sunglasses, so as not to shock Jasper straight away.

Jasper eyes were big and round as he took in Edward's appearance.

"I think we should go inside to talk, don't you?" and he led him by the arm, back into the house.

Jasper just folded into the armchair. He hadn't said a word since seeing Edward, just kept staring.

"I expect you have a million questions to ask?" Edward said with a soft smile in Jasper's direction

I could see he wanted to take this slow, without alarming him unduly.

The wild thoughts were fighting with each other as every sane answer was dismissed in Jasper's head.

In the end he just asked :"How?"

Edward and I looked at each other. Edward nodded in my direction, giving me permission to explain the situation. He deferred to my superior knowledge regarding vampires and knew my explanation would sound perhaps a tad more believable than his.

Taking a deep breath, I went and sat by Jaspers side.

"Jasper, as a medical man of science and learning, you must know there are events that occur that defy believability?"

"You mean like miracles?" he asked.

"Well sort of " I replied. "There are also myths and improbable beings that cannot be explained away...that you have heard of, but never believed they existed."

"Like what? I really don't understand what this has to do with Edward?"

He ran his hands through his hair, his face a mask of confusion.

"Jasper" I said softly, "It has everything to do with Edward. He is now that improbable being."

"What? What improbable being, what are you saying, I don't understand?"

Edward stopped me from saying any more as he stood up and went to sit by Jasper's side.

"Take my hand, Jasper."

Jasper looked puzzled but took Edward's hand anyway.

He flinched as he felt icy feel of his skin.

"What the fuck?" "What is going on?"

"I am a vampire, Jasper. I am, standing here before you, to all intents and purposes alive, but as of now, I am one of the undead. An immortal being."

"Is this some kind of joke?" Jasper asked, "because it's not fucking funny!"

"It's no joke, Jasper. The only way I could continue having any semblance of a normal life was to be changed into a vampire. This way, I get to walk again, be what I was again, just in an altered way. An altered perfect version of myself. It's still me, Jasper, inside, it's still me."

Jasper, got up and started pacing up and down, his head in his hands as he tried to make sense of the impossible.

He stopped short as another thought struck him.

"So who did this to you? Who changed you into a vampire?"

Without even looking my way, Edward simply said:"Bella."

Jasper looked at me like a crazy person.

"Bella? Bella did this?"

He fell back into the armchair . "Fuck me to hell and back" he gasped, his face blank as unreality hit him with an almighty thump.

To drive the point home, Edward stood up and removed his sunglasses.

"Holy fuck!" he exclaimed, as he took in the twin icy orbs and pinpoint black pupils.

"Those are fucking awesome!"

We talked long into the afternoon, and as the shadows lengthened Jasper finally became able to accept the situation. I was so glad it was Jasper that had found out first. Emmett's unpredictable nature would be very hard to convince and Jasper agreed, saying he would tell him first before bringing him over to see us.

The following day, Jasper brought Emmett and Alice over.

Emmett clearly hadn't taken on board what Jasper had told him, as he strode straight up to Edward asking what the hell was going on.

Edward removed his sunglasses again and Emmett staggered back.

"What the fuck's the matter with your eyes, for Christ sake?"

"Nothing, Emmett, nothing at all. Didn't you listen to what Jasper told you last night?"

"Yeah, some stupid notion of you being a vampire... As if, right?"

Edward didn't say anything, he just bent down and lifted Emmett up in the air with one hand.

Emmett shouted for him to put him down and Jasper laughed out loud, seeing Emmett's huge size being lifted up like a rag doll.

I rolled my eyes and thought : "Now you're just showing off" but a grin tugged at my mouth.

We explained again to Emmett and Alice as best we could, how this had all come about, but how do you really explain the unexplainable?

Emmett eventually calmed down and in typical fashion kept asking Edward to show his incredible strength, like a party trick.

Alice was enthralled by the idea. As she was a doctor, the thought that someone could be walking around without a heartbeat completely blew her away.

It threw us a little when she suddenly gasped and put a hand to her mouth.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Oh my god...I hadn't thought of it until now...you kill people!"

"No Alice, WE don't. Edward and I just kill animals, the same way you eat meat to live. We just like ours a little fresher than yours that's all!"

She laughed shakily: "That is a relief to know!"

After they had had their fill of information, they all agreed with one voice; they didn't care what Edward was only that he was back with them.

They left us then, agreeing to meet up on Saturday at the club, to sing on stage.

Eclipse was as packed as usual, and I watched Edward on stage as he tuned his guitar. He was dressed all in black. Black tee shirt, black skinny jeans, black leather jacket, with the collar turned up. To complete the ensemble, were the black sunglasses to cover his eyes. He looked like a sex god standing there, the spotlight illuminating every handsome plane of his face. Whether this outfit was intentional, playing up to his new found vampire image, I didn't know.

Knowing Edward, it probably was.

He loved being a vampire. I mean he really loved it. It was as though he was born to it. There had been no frenzied craving for blood. He was quite content to go hunting for deer with me, enjoying the chase and the closeness it brought us.

My idea about our past lives just strengthened the fact that I was right. He had been a vampire before, we had been together before, and nothing could sway my conviction.

A group of young girls had gathered at the front of the stage and as Edward began to sing, the collective sounds of oohs and sighs could be heard, as they stared up at him in adoration.

It was probably something to do with the slight edge of menace that Edward now had.

"Bad boys" always have an allure to the female sex and Edward was the personification of a bad boy.

Of course, what they didn't know was that he was MY bad boy. I grinned at the thought. I'd show him later on that I could be a "bad girl" too...a very bad girl...

They finished their first set and to the delight of the girls at his feet, he brought out the stool to begin his solo. This time he didn't dedicate the song to me, he just looked in my direction , knowing no words were needed.

As he started to sing, the sighs from below increased in quantity.

Every time our eyes meet

This feeling inside me

Is almost more than I can take

Baby when you touch me

I can feel how much you love me

And it just blows me away

I've never been this close to anyone or anything

I can hear your thoughts, I can hear your dreams.

I don't know how you do what you do

I'm so in love with you

It just keeps getting better.

I wanna spend the rest of my life

With you by my side

Forever and ever.

Every little thing that you do

Baby I'm amazed by you.

The smell of your skin

The taste of your kiss

The way you whisper in the dark

Your hair all around me

Baby you surround me

You touch every place in my heart

Oh it feels like the first time, every time

I wanna spend the whole night in your eyes

I don't know how you do what you do

I'm so in love with you

It just keeps getting better.

I wanna spend the rest of my life

With you by my side

Forever and ever.

Every little thing that you do

Baby, I'm amazed by you.

The young girls below him were ecstatic in their applause, as the rest of the crowd showed their appreciation. He took a bow and our eyes met. I blew him a kiss, and he did that pretend "catch" with his hand and put it against his chest. He mouthed "I love you" and I did the same back.

An incredible feeling stole over me, of coming home.

As summer changed her coat to the more vibrant red/gold hue of Autumn, the days shortened and the nights started drawing in.

We were now almost like a married couple, finishing each others sentences, laughing at the same jokes, so in tune with one another, we were two parts of the whole.

I was helping him with some research in his study, as he was starting a new novel, when he looked at me and just smiled.

"What was that for?" I asked , smiling back.

"Nothing really, I was just thinking, we fit together well, don't we? and I don't mean just in the bedroom either."

I went over to him and sat on his lap. Putting my arms around his neck, I murmured "Like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle."

"I just hope now there are no more surprises for us. "

"Don't even think like that." I warned.

"Too late," I thought worriedly, "now he's gone and tempted fate."


	14. Chapter 15

Chapter 15.

Rose dropped me off, waving a cheery goodbye, as laden with shopping bags, I went in search of Edward.

We had had a thoroughly enjoyable day, doing what women the world over enjoyed most... shopping...well almost,... apart from sex, I thought sinfully.

I found Edward sprawled in a chair, perusing over his latest manuscript, balls of paper cast aside at his feet.

I dumped my bags on the sofa, leaned over to give him a quick kiss before delving back into my shopping bags to parade my wares.

"I found this gorgeous dress" I said, holding it up against me. "What do you think?"

"Utterly captivating" Edward said, looking at me intently.

"I also got an absolute divine top, that will go with the skirt I have upstairs."

I held the top to my chest as Edward rose out of his chair for a closer look."See?" I garbled on," it has all this intricate stitching and there are buttons down the side and if you hold it up to the light..."

"Will you marry me?" Edward said softly, lifting up my chin to interrupt me.

"What?" dazed, I could only stare back at him, open mouthed.

"I said, will you marry me?" He took the top and tossed it onto the sofa.

Holding my hand to his chest, he said, "Feel that? No heart beats there. That is because I have given it to you, for you to take care of forever and forever is what I want with you, Bella, "

He kissed my forehead, the loving gesture melting me.

"I love you with an intensity that scares me sometimes, it's power so much greater than any strength I now have... marry me, Isabella Swan, and make me the happiest man in the world."

All thoughts fled my mind except one...I wanted this man so much.

"Yes" I answered, "Yes, yes, yes, and yes!"

He picked me up in his arms as my hands went round his neck, an exultant look on his face. I felt exactly the same way.

We wanted it to be a small affair, and Rose and Alice helped me pick out my dress.

I didn't want a lacy frilly "meringue" shaped dress. I wanted something that would suit my tall figure.

I knew it straight away, when I first saw it.

It was a pale cream, the strapless bodice clinging to the fullness of my breasts, and scattered with seed pearls that graduated down into the soft folds that draped my body, accentuating each curve. It was slimline in it's cut and the hemline draped away at the back: sexy yet demure, I knew it was perfect. With my hair up, secured with a single white rose, it looked stunning. At least I hoped Edward thought so.

I could see Alice's eyes fill up with tears and even Rose looked overcome as she said "Fucking breathtaking."

She had come up trumps again and had secured the paperwork for me from "someone in the know." I didn't ask and I didn't care, as long as I got to marry my wonderful man.

We were getting married in Edward's house. Rose had festooned it with flowers and candles, and the aroma filled the whole house.

She had agreed to my request to give me away, her face a picture of astonishment and emotion. She was the only sort of family I had and I loved her dearly.

The day dawned and the sun came out to celebrate the occasion with us, basking us all in its warmth.

As I walked toward Edward, resplendent in his silver grey morning suit, my heart overflowed. Standing so tall and straight and utterly handsome next to Emmett, his best man, I couldn't get to him fast enough.

Standing next to him, his eyes never leaving my face, he said "You are beautiful, so so beautiful" and kissed my hand.

The service was over too quickly and they all gathered around us, the hugging and kissing going on forever.

My garter, that Rose had got me with a sly grin, was pulled off in Edwards teeth, much to Jasper's amusement. If I could have blushed I would have, I giggled instead, making Edward growl suggestively.

Emmett's speech was both funny and poignant as we all knew how close we had come to losing Edward and this day never happening.

Rose stood up, a glass of champagne in her hand for show and looked at the pair of us, arm in arm.

"I have known Bella for many years", which caused a few snickers amongst us, "and in all that time she has never let me down. She is the most kindest, warmest person I could ever wish to meet and I am honoured to call her my friend. She has been my rock, my confident, and if ever I need her I know she will always be there. Now she has Edward by her side and a more well matched couple would be impossible to find. He is the perfect man for her with his unselfish loving ways, and I know they are truly blessed. Not many are lucky enough to find their soul mate, and I wish them all the luck and love in the world. So raise your glasses in a toast to the new Mr and Mrs Cullen!"

Everyone stood and toasted us and I was filled with love for Rose and her lovely speech. I was just as amazed to think she had got through it without one swear word!

That night, our wedding night, alone in our bedroom with the just the moon for illumination, Edward held me in his arms. Our naked bodies pressed tightly together as we embraced each other.

"This has been the one of the best days of my life"he whispered tenderly.

"One of the best?" I queried.

"Yes, the other was the first night I saw you in the club and knew I had to have you. Of course there was also the first night we made love, and the sight of you coming toward me on the beach when you changed me, will stay with me forever."

"Those are my favourites too, but I will also never forget the day you asked me to marry you."

"And I will never forget when you answered yes, Mrs Cullen."

I squealed in delight as I heard my new name coming from his lips and I jumped and put my legs around his waist.

He clasped the cheeks of my ass in his hands and carried me over to the bed.

"Now I want to make mad passionate love to my wife" he said with a provocative grin.

Kissing down my neck, I felt his hand at my breast, rolling the nipple between his fingers. I moaned low at the sensation it brought to between my legs. He hitched my leg over his, his mouth seeking mine and I could feel his erection quivering near my groin as though trying to seek my entrance on its own.

His tongue plundered my mouth as his hands traced a soft caress down my body. He hitched my leg higher, until I could feel his shaft right against me and with one gentle push he was inside me. The sideways motion was so sensual as both our eyes were level and his tongue snaked into my waiting mouth matching every thrust his erection made.

We moved as one in slow motion, an emotional arousal that flowed from me into him.

Lying side by side, he gripped my behind to pull himself in even deeper and my hand gripped his hair as low moans of ecstasy escaped me. Sucking my lip as his mouth pulled away, he stared into my eyes, our breath coming ever faster.

Our eyes locked, each watching the other's reaction to the stimulus that was happening further down, as we continued to keep the pace slow. We met each intense thrust together, grinding our hips, and I experienced an erotic charge I watched his face lose control, his desire too naked to conceal.

My orgasm hit me with a force I wasn't expecting as we had never made love this slowly before. It's powerful build up was all the more enhanced by the steady push of his erection into me. Edward kept hold of my face in his hands watching me come as each exquisite shudder flowed through me.

He still kept up the steady pace, pushing in and pulling out, grinding on my clitoris as his one hand moved down to pull my leg higher still and the other gripping my ass to pull me in.

I could feel myself tighten yet again and thought "this can't be possible" as another orgasm ripped through me with even more force than the first. I cried out, bit my lip, shuddered over and over,the sensation almost painful in it's intensity.

His head craned back as he gave one final thrust, emptying himself so hard I could feel it spurting inside me.

As our senses slowly came back to normal, he lovingly brushed my hair out of my eye, kissing me again.

"I love you, Mrs Cullen.

"I love you, Mr Cullen.

I had never been so happy.

Edward was hard at work on his new book. I think being a vampire, now gave him an even bigger insight in how the story should go. He had me helping him with research and had even enlisted Rose with some investigative background checks. She had phoned earlier to say she had found what he needed and would head our way in about half an hour.

The sun was just starting to lower in the sky and as the room got darker, I got up to put on the table lamps.

Edward was sat behind his desk when a slight draught crept into the room.

Human reactions would never have sensed the intrusion, but I knew by the scent and the subtle change in the air that a vampire had entered our lives again.

Edward's head jerked up, his nose sniffing out the unknown scent and he growled deep in his throat.

Standing by the French doors, stood a dark figure, dressed in black.

"Aro" I breathed, a sense of unease running through me.

Edward jumped to his feet staring at him then at me.

"You know this guy?" he asked.

Aro strolled forward with an arrogant strut.

"Oh Yes, Isabella knows me very well. If I'm not mistaken, you must be Edward."

With his head cocked to one side, you would have thought him harmless, but I knew different. He was a merciless killer, who loved to play games with his prey.

Edward started to move from behind his desk and I warned him to stay where he was. This vampire was far too dangerous to mess with, and I didn't want Edward getting hurt.

"Oh come now Isabella, don't spoil all the fun. This is a fine specimen you have chosen for your mate."

Aro looked Edward up and down, the sneer never far from his grinning mouth.

"You see Edward, I come here from time to time to check up on Isabella, as I have a certain fondness for her. I so very nearly killed her, did you know that Edward? Has she told you how I nearly ripped out her throat and sucked the life right out of her?"

I knew Aro was taunting Edward now just for sport, and it was working, as Edward was getting angrier by the minute. I was beside myself with worry as Edward got ever closer to Aro.

"Has she told you how I took pity on such a beautiful creature and made her like me, made her into the fabulous immortal you now happen to be fucking? I would wager she is superb in the bedroom."

This was the last straw for Edward and he launched himself at Aro with a speed that astonished me.

With a ferocious growl, he pinned Aro to the wall, snarling with fury. Aro pushed him away but Edward was on him again as he moved with lightening speed and ferocity.

Fear played on Aro's face as he realised he had made a fatal mistake in goading Edward.

I had also mistakenly believed Edward was in danger, forgetting he was a "newborn"capable of stronger capabilities than either I or Aro.

His strength and speed was astonishing, as he finally got Aro in his grasp, ready to rip him to shreds.

"Don't, oh please don't!" a voice screamed.

Rose stood in the doorway taking in the scene before her.

"Please don't hurt him" she pleaded, putting her hand on Edwards arm to stay his execution.

"Rose?" I stared at my best friend, wondering why she was defending this abominable creature.

Edward let Aro up, still keeping one hand around his neck, low growls emanating from him.

Rose looked at me with an anguished expression, her hands wringing together in turmoil.

"He was my first great love, my only love as it happens."

She came to me, holding my hand in hers.

"I met him not long after I was changed. I had fled to Italy, wanting change in my life and Aro had taken me under his wing., the same as I had done for you, Bella."

She continued with her explanation, looking now over at Aro.

"He was kind to me, and we fell in love." At the "pfft"sound that came from me, she smiled and said:"He was not like you see him now. Time hadn't diminished the human qualities he still retained.

"He was my lover and my best friend and I basked in his adoration for me."

She turned back to me and with shame written all over her face, she said:"I killed back then Bella, I hunted humans with Aro and drained their blood. I have tried to put that behind me as the centuries have rolled on but I never forget my past completely."

She slumped down in the chair, her head in her hands. "I became increasingly uncomfortable with what I was doing until the very idea was making me sick. When I killed my first animal, it felt so right. I tried to get Aro to join me, but killing humans was too ingrained in him and he refused."

"I tried to separate in my mind how Aro's lifestyle was so different to mine, but it eventually drove a wedge between us, and I left him."

"If you had stayed true to your vampire state, we would still be together now" Aro shouted.

Rose went over to him and asked Edward to remove his hand. With reluctance, Edward released him and Aro immediately took Rose in his arms.

"I haven't been watching Isabella all this time, it's you I have been keeping watch on. You must have known I would never have let you leave me without knowing what was happening in your life."

His hand caressed her cheek with a gentleness I wouldn't have thought possible.

"I still love you Rose."

She put a hand up to his face,as though to imprint his features forever in her mind.

"That was a long time ago Aro, and too much water has sailed under that bridge to ever go back to what we had. I still cannot kill humans and you cannot stop. You will always have a place in my heart, but you must go. These are my friends now and this is the life I have chosen."

Aro gazed longingly at her and kissed her softly. He turned to Edward and I, and with a bow merely said: "My apologies to you both, I will not bother you again."

With one last look at Rose, he was gone.

Rose was beside herself to think it was her that had brought all this upset to me, that it was her that had led Aro to stalk me while he was watching her.

I hugged her and told her not to be so stupid, she was my best friend and whatever had happened in her past, I could never compensate her for the help she had given me. Her hatred for killing humans, she had passed on to me and without her I would be a very different vampire altogether.

As we sat quietly, I couldn't help asking, with a grin on my face: "Aro? Really?"

"Yes Aro, really"she grinned back.

I knew we were going to be okay.

After handing Edward the research information she had been bringing him, she left, saying she would see us next week.

"Well" I said, with a big sigh. "what a day this turned out to be!"

Edward took me in his arms and said archly:"Are there any other strange men in your life I should know about, young lady?"

"No, at least I don't think so" I said, my eyes twinkling.

"There had better not be" he growled into my neck, "or heads will roll!"

I shivered at the usual affect he was having with me.

"I gotta tell you Edward, seeing you so...so...fucking dangerous was a complete turn on."

"Is that right?" he leered at me, baring his teeth. "You had better not misbehave then, hadn't you?"

"But I thought you liked me being a bad girl" I said coyly, in my best little girl voice.

Edward just growled again, slung me over his shoulder and hauled me upstairs.

Turned on by what had recently happened downstairs, we made love with a ferocity, standing up against the bedroom wall with my legs tightly wrapped around Edward , both biting and licking each other until we came rapidly, crying out together.

Afterwards we lay spent in each others arms, caressing each other.

"Will our life always be like this, Bella?"

"I suspect that we will have certain moments that will be, shall we say, slightly different to the normal married couple." I laughed. "But it will never be boring" I added, playfully.

"Thank god for that Bella, I don't do boring."

He looked at me then with love in his eyes and said: "We have forever and forever, Bella, that I CAN do."

I took his face in my hands and kissed him.

He was the soul I had lost, then found again; my twin flame man, forever mine to love.


End file.
